A More Relaxed Way to Meditate | Alexis Santos
Host Dan Harris speaks with Alexis Santos, a core teacher in the Ten Percent Happier app and student of Burmese monk Sayadaw U Tejaniya, about a more relaxed approach to meditation. They discuss how to move beyond over-efforting by focusing on the mind's attitude and cultivating natural, continuous awareness in daily life.
Deep Dive Analysis
10 Topic Outline
Introduction to Alexis Santos and Sayadaw U Tejaniya's Approach
Sayadaw U Tejaniya's Background and Natural Practice Philosophy
Shift from Object-Focused to Mind-Attitude Meditation
The Illuminating Question: What's the Mind's Attitude?
Understanding That Awareness Itself Is Not Difficult
Dan Harris's Experience with a Relaxed Retreat Style
Developing Awareness Momentum in Daily Life
The Connection Between Awareness, Wisdom, and Reduced Suffering
Sayadaw's Three Core Instructions for Meditators
Sayadaw U Tejaniya's Personal Journey and Teaching Presence
6 Key Concepts
Winning at Meditation
A common problem, especially for type-A individuals, where excessive effort or trying to force an outcome in meditation leads to suffering rather than genuine progress or insight.
Natural Meditation Approach
A style of practice, taught by Sayadaw U Tejaniya, that emphasizes relaxing and opening awareness to include all aspects of present experience—emotions, mental states, and physical feelings—in an accessible manner, focusing on the mind's attitude rather than just the object.
Attitude of the Mind
Refers to the underlying mental habits or disposition with which one engages with any experience, which critically influences the quality of that experience and can lead to either suffering or well-being. Checking this attitude reveals underlying wanting or aversion.
Awareness Momentum
The cumulative effect of repeatedly and lightly bringing awareness to the present moment, which gradually strengthens the capacity for continuous awareness, making it more spontaneous and less effortful over time, like a light switch staying on more often.
Right View (in meditation)
An initial form of wisdom that involves intellectually understanding and reminding oneself that all experiences are natural, impersonal processes arising from causes and conditions, rather than being driven by personal preferences or identification.
Moha (Delusion)
A state of mind characterized by not clearly knowing or perceiving something as it truly is, often manifesting as being absorbed in an experience (like seeing) without conscious awareness that the experience itself is occurring.
8 Questions Answered
He is an influential Burmese monk and meditation teacher who focuses on teaching a natural, relaxed approach to meditation, emphasizing the attitude of the mind rather than just the object of awareness.
Unlike methods that strictly focus on a primary object like the breath, his approach prioritizes understanding the 'attitude of the mind' that is observing, recognizing that the mind doing the knowing is more important than the object being known.
This question illuminates the mental habits, such as wanting or aversion, that are influencing one's relationship to the present moment, which are key determinants of the quality of one's experience and can lead to suffering or well-being.
Awareness itself is not inherently difficult; it is naturally accessible, but people often get absorbed in experiences and forget to check for its presence, requiring light, consistent reminders to return.
Yes, this approach is highly scalable and beneficial for daily life, encouraging practitioners to regularly 'tap the swing' of awareness and check their mind's attitude, thereby building a continuous momentum of awareness.
Developing awareness and wisdom allows one to perceive that all experiences are constantly changing processes, which helps reduce suffering caused by clinging to pleasant things or resisting unpleasant ones, fostering a more skillful and peaceful way of living.
His three simple 'yogi jobs' are: have right view (see things as nature), check to see if awareness is present, and develop continuity (practice with light, untiring effort).
His own struggles with depression and drug use as a layperson, and the insights he gained from observing these daily life conditions, led him to emphasize being present with life's exact circumstances and learning from the difference between allowing and resisting.
17 Actionable Insights
1. Avoid Over-Efforting in Meditation
Do not try too hard or push for a specific outcome in meditation, as over-efforting is counterproductive and can lead to suffering because the practice doesn’t work by force.
2. Focus on Mind’s Attitude
Recognize that the way you observe a meditation object (e.g., breath, sensation) is more important than the object itself; cultivate an understanding of the nature of awareness.
3. Check Mind’s Attitude Regularly
During meditation, periodically ask yourself, ‘What’s the attitude in the mind right now?’ to observe if you are wanting something to happen or stop happening.
4. Ask ‘Are You Aware?’ Lightly
Regularly ask yourself, ‘Are you aware right now?’ using a light touch, like tapping a swing, to gently bring awareness back to the present moment without being neurotic or striving.
5. Cultivate Right View (Wisdom)
Adopt the ‘right view’ by intellectually reminding yourself that all experiences (emotions, sensations, thoughts) are natural processes arising from causes and conditions, rather than personal events.
6. Develop Continuity with Light Effort
Practice meditation with a light, sustained effort to ensure continuity of awareness without becoming tired or strained, emphasizing the importance of consistent, gentle practice.
7. Observe Desire/Aversion Without Judgment
When noticing wanting or aversion in the mind, simply observe it without self-laceration, as this act of seeing itself can be a form of self-liberation.
8. Practice Mindfulness in Daily Life
Recognize that meditation is about developing skillful states of mind, which can be done in any moment, including during conversations or negative reactions, not just in formal sitting practice.
9. Build Awareness Momentum
Consistently apply light touches of awareness throughout the day to build momentum, making awareness more sustained and less effortful over time, eventually leading to the ’light switch’ of awareness staying on more often.
10. Learn from Any Experience
Cultivate the understanding that any experience, regardless of its nature (overwhelm, chaos, joy), can be a basis for developing awareness, stability, and wisdom, as long as the right attitude is present.
11. Combine Directed and Open Awareness
When practicing open awareness, especially if you tend to get lost, alternate with periods of directed awareness (e.g., focusing on the breath for a few minutes) to maintain a foundation of concentration.
12. Accept Conditions As They Are
Embrace the practice of not manipulating or controlling experiences, but rather being with conditions exactly as they are, without judgment or striving for them to be different.
13. Practice Non-Grasping/Non-Clinging
Recognize that everything is constantly changing, and grasping onto impermanent experiences leads to suffering; gradually practice letting go of grasping and clinging to reorient your interaction with reality.
14. Form Skillful Mental Ruts
Recognize that personality and habits are not fixed but are ‘ruts’ of mental momentum; intentionally cultivate and deepen ‘skillful ruts’ of awareness and understanding to change how you experience life.
15. Develop Awareness of Seeing
Cultivate interest and skill in simply being aware that ‘seeing is happening,’ rather than getting absorbed in the content of what is seen, as this can be a radical change.
16. Relax the Body
Begin meditation by consciously relaxing the body to foster a more receptive state for awareness and ease.
17. Be Yourself and Be Aware
Allow yourself to be exactly as you are in the present moment while cultivating awareness, recognizing that self-acceptance is a powerful and healing part of the practice.
7 Key Quotes
If you over-effort, if you try to make something happen, it's pretty much guaranteed not to happen. What is pretty much guaranteed is that you will suffer.
Dan Harris
The mind that's working is more important than the thing that we're looking at.
Alexis Santos
Awareness itself is not difficult.
Alexis Santos
The very simple, simple but not easy, as we say, mental maneuver there of checking the attitude is really an invitation to see how are you relating to the present moment?
Alexis Santos
There is nothing about the experience itself that precludes being aware.
Alexis Santos
The momentum of our life and our identity is a lot less fixed than we might assume it to be.
Alexis Santos
It was almost like the very first time in my life where I had truly been allowed to be just as I am. I didn't have to be any different.
Alexis Santos
1 Protocols
Sayadaw U Tejaniya's Three Jobs of a Meditator
Alexis Santos (describing Sayadaw U Tejaniya's teaching)- Have right view: See things as nature, understanding that whatever is happening is a process arising from conditions, rather than being driven by self-view or preference.
- Check to see if awareness is present: Regularly ask yourself if you are aware right now.
- Develop continuity: Practice with a light, untiring effort so that awareness can gain momentum without causing exhaustion.