Brain Won't Stop? Here's How to Calm Down | Dan Harris

1. Action Absorbs Anxiety

When facing anxiety, especially about things like AI impacting your job, identify what’s within your control and take action, even if small, to address it, as this actively reduces worry.

2. Never Worry Alone

Share your anxieties and concerns with friends or a community, as humans are wired for social support, and discussing issues together can be very helpful in reducing worry.

3. Embrace Repetitive Wisdom

Understand that due to life’s distractions, you will constantly need to hear foundational wisdom and practices repeated; embrace this repetition as essential for integrating insights and ‘remembering’ to stay mindful.

4. Reframe Actions to Core Values

To reduce the need for external approval, regularly connect with your core values and reframe your daily actions as serving a greater purpose, which removes egoic stakes and provides intrinsic motivation.

5. Defang Ego with Humor

Observe your ego’s constant desire for external approval or self-aggrandizement with a light, humorous awareness, as this mindful approach helps to defang its power and reduce its influence.

6. Label Repetitive Thoughts ‘Dead End’

To break free from unhelpful, repetitive thought loops, gently label them as ‘dead end’ when they arise, signaling to your mind that there is no utility in continuing down that path.

7. Compassionate Self-Talk

In moments of distress or anxiety, speak to yourself with the same compassion and reassurance you would offer a friend, reminding yourself of safety to help calm your nervous system and shift out of fear.

8. Mindful Discomfort Coping

During uncomfortable situations like an MRI, practice mindfulness by observing sensations of discomfort, tightness, or racing thoughts, which helps move your brain out of the fear center and into a more rational state.

9. Embrace Visceral Impermanence

During meditation, particularly a body scan, focus on the constant change and flux of physical sensations to develop a visceral, not just intellectual, understanding of impermanence, which aids in coping with uncertainty.

10. Certainty Isn’t Truth

When you feel absolutely certain about your viewpoint, pause and consider why others might believe differently, remembering that a feeling of certainty does not inherently mean you are correct.

11. Separate Values from Opinions

In political or personal discussions, differentiate between your core values and your opinions; open yourself to other viewpoints, as your opinions may change while your values remain intact, fostering greater understanding.

12. Shift to Compassion in Grief

When facing grief or the pain of another, move from pure empathy, which can be overwhelming, to compassion by adding the desire to help, creating a more empowering and less overwhelming mental state.

13. Love Endures Beyond Loss

When experiencing grief, remind yourself that the love you felt for the departed person or animal remains unchanged and continues to exist, even in their physical absence.

14. Employ Reflective Listening

In conversations, listen carefully and then summarize the main points or ‘headline’ of what the other person has said back to them, which makes them feel heard and understood.

15. Practice Conversational Looping

In conversations, use ’looping’ by asking clarifying questions like ‘Did that make sense?’ or ‘Are we on the same page?’ to ensure mutual understanding and signal that you are actively listening.

16. Avoid Heedless Intoxicant Use

When consuming alcohol or other intoxicants, be mindful to avoid using them to the point of heedlessness, which means losing self-awareness or acting unkindly, allowing for personal interpretation of moderation.