Jen Kirkman, Comedian, Author

1. Release Meditation Perfectionism

Let go of the expectation of perfection in meditation; understand that it’s a practice, and you won’t instantly uproot deeply ingrained conditioning.

2. Embrace Doubt in Practice

View doubt as a natural and acceptable part of any practice, including meditation or belief systems, and use it as a signal to continue rather than stop.

3. Practice Meditation Self-Compassion

When you get lost or distracted during meditation, give yourself a break and practice self-compassion rather than striving for perfection or ‘winning’.

4. Embrace Shared Humanity Mindset

Adopt the perspective that ‘we’re all just walking each other home,’ fostering compassion and reducing judgment towards others by recognizing shared humanity and impermanence.

5. Commit to Daily Meditation

Commit to meditating every day, even if the practice varies, as consistent engagement builds a ‘bank’ of resilience that helps in unexpected situations.

6. Manage Meditation Expectations

Understand that meditation is not a silver bullet; you will still experience agitation and react to situations, but the duration and intensity of negative emotions may decrease.

7. Shorten Anger’s Half-Life

Aim to reduce the ‘half-life’ of anger through meditation, recognizing that shorter bursts of anger cause significantly less damage than prolonged periods.

8. Cultivate Opinion Neutrality

Adopt a neutral stance regarding what others think of you, avoiding assumptions of dislike and not caring about others’ potential negative opinions.

9. Detach from External Impact

Practice detaching from external events and intellectual anger, preventing them from deeply affecting your emotional state or ‘soul’.

10. Reduce Pleasure-Seeking for Mood

Stop using food, coffee, or drinks to change your emotional state, instead aiming for contentment and calm without the expectation that external pleasures will make you feel better.

11. Prioritize Thoroughbred Self-Care

Prioritize self-care, including getting enough sleep and exercise, to protect against panic attacks and reduce proneness to freak out when in a weakened emotional or physical state.

12. Prevent Panic with Self-Care

Avoid being overtired or over-caffeinated, as these physical states can make one more prone to panic attacks.

13. Explore Meditation Alternatives

If focusing on breath causes anxiety, try body scan meditation (feeling sensations throughout the body) or loving-kindness meditation (sending good vibes, even to those you dislike, to build compassion).

14. Personalize Mantra Breathing

When meditating, breathe in and out with personalized mantras, such as ‘I am loved,’ ‘I am soothed,’ ‘I trust the process,’ or ‘breathe in God, breathe out [your name],’ to foster compassion, trust, or a sense of not being in control.

15. Practice Out-Loud Mantras

If you struggle with intrusive thoughts during meditation, try repeating a mantra out loud to help focus your mind and reduce mental chatter.

16. Limit Meditation Options

Maintain a small, manageable repertoire of 1-4 meditation techniques to choose from daily, rather than overwhelming yourself with too many options.

17. Find Preferred Meditation Teacher

Identify a meditation teacher whose voice and style you resonate with, and then utilize their resources for a more effective practice.

18. Clear Morning Mind Chatter

Meditate in the morning to clear out desires, disappointments, and obsessions that arise upon waking, preparing your mind for the day.

19. Morning Singing Bowl Meditation

Meditate first thing in the morning, even before getting out of bed, using loud Tibetan singing bowls (found on YouTube) to create a conducive environment.

20. Nightly Body Scan for Sleep

Perform a body scan meditation before bed to aid in falling asleep.

21. Use Body Scan for Sadness

Employ body scan meditation not just for sleep, but also when feeling sad, as it can help bring you into your body and alleviate emotional distress.

22. Practice Mindful Showering

Practice mindfulness by focusing entirely on the present action, such as taking a shower and noticing the soap and lathering, to become aware of negative thought patterns.

23. Attend Group Meditation

Supplement home practice by attending group meditation classes (e.g., 3 times a week) if you find it difficult to do certain types of mindfulness meditation alone.

24. Select Guided Meditations Wisely

Use guided meditations when in a neutral state or for general appreciation, but be mindful of voice preferences, as some voices can be distracting.

25. Acknowledge Panic Attacks

When a panic attack starts, acknowledge it by saying ‘ugh, here we go’ to reduce its duration.

26. Carry Panic Emergency Meds

Carry dissolvable Klonopin for panic attacks, but use it only if necessary, as the mere presence of the medication can sometimes help prevent a full-blown attack.

27. Combine Meditation & Medicine

Integrate meditation (e.g., centering prayer, rosary) with conventional medical treatments (like taking pills for high blood pressure) as a holistic approach to health.

28. Meditate for Stability Amidst Chaos

Re-engage with meditation to cultivate stability and a sense of personal agency, especially during periods of intense work or life fluctuations.

29. Develop Emotional Resilience

Cultivate a mindset where external events, especially in a volatile industry, do not deeply affect your emotional state or self-esteem.

30. Meditate for Impermanence Fear

Use meditation to manage existential fears like the fear of dying, which can also indirectly help cope with the impermanence of career or other life aspects.

31. Daily Quiet Self-Reflection

Dedicate time daily to quiet reflection to stay in touch with your evolving desires and goals, especially when external demands are high.

32. Listen to Inner Creative Self

Trust and listen to your inner self, as this practice can lead to new creative ideas and insights.

33. Process Emotions Before Creating

Fully process difficult emotions and life experiences before attempting to channel them into creative work, allowing for a more effective and less raw performance.

34. Connoisseur of Neuroses

Through meditation, become intimately aware of your neuroses and ‘craziness’ without being consumed by them, enabling you to use them creatively (e.g., in comedy) without appearing unstable.

35. Self-Care Through Clothing

Dress up in a way that makes you feel good and expresses your authentic self, even for everyday activities or work, as a form of positive self-care.

36. Focus on Core Strengths

Identify your core strengths and talents, and consistently focus your efforts on developing and utilizing them.

37. Pursue “Lottery” Opportunities

Engage in ’lottery’ activities (e.g., pitching shows for agents) that might not be your ultimate passion but are necessary for career maintenance, while simultaneously pursuing what you truly love.

38. Learn from Losing Control

When you lose your temper or get overly judgmental, reflect on the experience to learn and adjust future actions or expectations, rather than dwelling on the imperfection.

39. Pray for Guidance & Acceptance

If you feel stuck or overly attached to a specific outcome, pray (even without a specific belief in a deity) to articulate your desires, release control, and open yourself to what is truly right for you.

40. Adopt “Vessel for Talent” Mindset

Before performing or engaging in creative work, view yourself as a ‘vessel for talent’ rather than the sole source, which can alleviate pressure and foster a sense of being guided.

41. Release Need to Define Everything

Let go of the need to definitively decide or define everything, especially abstract concepts, as it often doesn’t matter what you think and can free up mental energy.