Meditation is Not Just a Solo Endeavor | Pamela Ayo Yetunde
Pamela Ayo Yetunde discusses meditation as a team sport, emphasizing interdependence and the importance of engaging with societal suffering. She introduces "shock protection" and "living nobly in a time of ignobility," urging listeners to cultivate civility and sustain attention on issues of race and justice.
Deep Dive Analysis
15 Topic Outline
Meditation as a Solo Endeavor Pitfall
Sustaining Attention on Race Issues
The "Poisonous Luxury" of Tuning Out Suffering
Confronting One's Own Capacity for Harm
Violence as an Expression of Unhandled Suffering
Working with Difficult Emotions and Despair
The Mission of Buddhist Justice Reporter
Reconciling Buddhism with Social Justice
Happiness as a Team Sport and Wise Selfishness
The Concept of Shock Protection
Living Nobly in Times of Ignobility
Meditation's Impact on Relationships
No-Self as Interdependence
Practical Ramifications of Interdependence
First Steps on the Path to Civility
6 Key Concepts
Meditation as Solo Endeavor Pitfall
The initial belief that meditation is solely for personal benefits like stress reduction or focus can be a pitfall. Deeper practice reveals the self is less stable and more porous, and that true happiness depends on the well-being of others.
Poisonous Luxury of Tuning Out
The perceived 'luxury' of being able to ignore societal suffering (e.g., homeless people, violence against minority communities) is actually detrimental. It hardens the heart, makes one blind, and causes internal pain, rather than true peace or benefit.
Violence as Unhandled Suffering
Violence, which can range from snide comments to physical aggression, is often a manifestation of not knowing how to deal with one's own suffering. It can be an expression of powerlessness when individuals feel their power has been taken away.
Shock Protection
A coping mechanism, particularly for Black individuals in the U.S., that involves keeping emotions and expectations in check and preparing for major disappointment. It aims to prevent being completely thrown off one's center when faced with the realities of racism or injustice, though it can sometimes minimize experiences of joy.
Living Nobly in Ignobility
This refers to maintaining remarkable relational resilience and living into one's full humanity amidst a culture that often works against positive relationships. It involves differentiating oneself from 'drama people' or those solely focused on self-gratification, and instead committing to the well-being of others.
No-Self as Interdependence
An interpretation of the Buddhist concept of no-self, emphasizing that there is no isolated, inherent 'divine self' but rather a profound interconnectedness with all beings and things. This view is often transmitted in African-American and indigenous traditions, highlighting that our existence is found in relationship to others.
10 Questions Answered
While individuals may go 'in and out of sleep' on these issues, there is a sustained attention this time due to ongoing trials and viral video evidence, indicating a hopeful shift in engagement.
It's normal to fall 'asleep' and wake up; the practice is to bring mindfulness to the self-laceration that can come with waking up and to recognize that tuning out is a 'poisonous luxury' that ultimately hardens the heart.
Sitting with the reality of one's capacity for harm can lead to humility and inspire one to refrain from and renounce evil, by catching harmful impulses and choosing not to act on them.
It is a project founded by Pamela Ayo Yetunde and other Buddhist practitioners to observe and comment on the George Floyd trials. Its goal is to foster conversation within Buddhist communities about criminal justice and its impact on Black people.
Some practitioners believe justice work is political and disturbs equanimity, preferring not to 'take sides' or feel the suffering of attachment to outcomes, and they note that ancient texts don't explicitly focus on criminal justice systems.
From a Buddhist perspective, ignoring suffering goes against the Buddha's core teachings and bodhisattva vows. A 'hardened heart' from tuning out injustice ultimately causes personal pain and hinders true happiness, making engagement a form of 'wise selfishness'.
While meditation is a personal practice, its ultimate impact extends to relationships; being less reactive due to practice enhances interactions and creates space for intimacy, demonstrating a profound connection between individual practice and collective well-being.
It means cultivating relational resilience and living into one's full humanity through practices like mindfulness and loving-kindness, even when surrounded by a culture that often works against positive relationships and exhibits self-serving behavior.
In some traditions, 'no-self' is interpreted as the absence of an isolated, inherent self, emphasizing instead a profound interconnectedness with all beings and things. This view suggests that our 'self' is found in relationship to other 'not-selves'.
Start by recognizing each other as human beings who need kindness to flourish, greeting people with kind words, and infusing common phrases like 'pleased to meet you' with genuine sentiment and presence.
23 Actionable Insights
1. Train During Good Times
Consistently practice meditation when not overwhelmed or in crisis, as this builds a strong foundation that will automatically support you when inevitable difficulties arise.
2. View Meditation as Team Sport
Recognize that while meditation can start with selfish motivations, true happiness and deeper understanding reveal that the self is interconnected, making happiness dependent on the well-being of others.
3. Reject Tuning Out Suffering
Understand that the ability to ignore suffering, while seemingly comfortable, hardens the heart and makes one blind, ultimately causing personal detriment.
4. Acknowledge Inner Capacity for Harm
In meditation, honestly observe your own capacity for harmful thoughts or actions, including past instances of indifference, to cultivate humility and inspire renunciation of evil.
5. Promote Civility as Purpose
Adopt promoting civility as a fundamental human purpose, recognizing that mutual survival and societal functioning depend on respectful interaction.
6. Practice Wise Selfishness
Understand that true personal happiness, or ‘wise selfishness,’ involves acknowledging interdependence and working for the well-being of others, as we are a social species.
7. Engage with Diverse People
Make an effort to spend time with people from different backgrounds than your own, as this engagement helps you feel their pain and fosters a sense of shared community when they are targeted.
8. Understand Violence as Unhandled Suffering
Recognize that violent actions, from snide comments to physical aggression, often stem from an inability to process and hold one’s own suffering.
9. Cultivate Selflessness via Brahma Viharas
Practice the Brahma Viharas (loving-kindness, compassion, sympathetic joy, equanimity) to shift focus from constant self-gratification to promoting the well-being and happiness of others.
10. Build Relational Resilience
Enhance your ability to form healthy relationships across differences by regularly practicing mindfulness, meditation, loving-kindness, understanding interdependence, and participating in your community.
11. Interpret No-Self as Interdependence
Understand ’no self’ not as non-existence, but as a deep interconnectedness with all beings, which fosters a sense of shared existence and responsibility.
12. Dedicate Merit to All Beings
After meditation, intentionally direct any positive experiences or insights towards the well-being of all sentient beings, preventing narcissism and extending the benefit beyond yourself.
13. Relationships Motivate Meditation
Recognize that most of your time is spent in relationships, and let the desire to improve these interactions be a key motivation for your meditation practice.
14. Align Practice with Bodhisattva Vows
If you have taken vows to alleviate the suffering of all beings, critically examine whether your meditation practice is solely for personal benefit or if it also supports this broader commitment.
15. Accept Reality, Listen to Cries
Continuously meditate and commit to listening to the suffering and challenges in the world, even amidst personal anger or despair, to maintain a compassionate response.
16. Focus on Present Living
Amidst uncertainties about the future or death, consciously choose how you will live and embody your values in the present moment.
17. Prevent Harmful Impulses with Wisdom
Use your accumulated wisdom and ethical vows to catch and breathe through impulses to do harm, preventing you from acting on base instincts.
18. Normalize Waking Up to Issues
Accept that it’s normal to cycle between awareness and inattention to difficult social issues, and practice gentleness rather than self-criticism when you become aware again.
19. See All as One Community
Shift your perspective to see all people as part of a single human community, rather than categorizing them into ‘minority’ or ‘majority’ groups, to foster greater empathy and connection.
20. Avoid Siloing Human Experiences
Refrain from categorizing people into separate communities when discussing shared pain and injustice, as this excludes others who also feel concern and hinders collective empathy.
21. Recognize Others as Kind Humans
Begin interactions by acknowledging others as human beings who need kindness to flourish, fostering a commitment to mutual well-being.
22. Infuse Greetings with Sentiment
When greeting someone, pause to genuinely feel and express kind words like ‘I’m pleased to meet you,’ recognizing the unique and potentially fleeting nature of the encounter.
23. Prepare for Societal Challenges
Acknowledge the current societal dangers and prepare yourself mentally and emotionally for upcoming challenges and potential value conflicts, practicing ‘shock protection.’
7 Key Quotes
In crisis, we don't rise to our expectations, but we fall to our training.
Lama Rod Owens
What if we didn't consider the fact that we have the power to tune out as a luxury? Or maybe it's like a poisonous luxury, right?
Pamela Ayo Yetunde
If you look long enough in meditation, you will see Hitler. And it's all in there.
Thich Nhat Hanh (as quoted by Dan Harris)
Violence is what we do when we don't know how to handle our own suffering.
Jerry Colonna (as quoted by Dan Harris)
Our purpose should be at least to promote civility.
Pamela Ayo Yetunde
I'm not that kind of Buddhist.
Pamela Ayo Yetunde
If you want to be selfish, do it right. Wise selfishness... takes into account the other people on the bus, the other people on the planet, the people around you.
Dan Harris (attributing to the Dalai Lama)
1 Protocols
Promoting Civility in Daily Interactions
Pamela Ayo Yetunde- Recognize each other as human beings who flourish in the context of kindness.
- Start from a position of wishing each other kindness, rather than assuming enmity.
- When meeting someone for the first time or seeing them for the first time that day, have a few kind words to say.
- Pause before using phrases like 'I'm pleased to meet you,' feel the sentiment, and make eye contact.
- Be present and acknowledge the unique individual in front of you.