Soren Gordhamer, Being Mindful in Silicon Valley

Jan 11, 2017 Episode Page ↗
Overview

Soren Gordhamer, founder of Wisdom 2.0, discusses his journey from personal suffering to creating a global movement that bridges mindfulness and technology. He shares insights on connecting with diverse audiences, the importance of presence, and the need to cultivate internal wisdom alongside external tech advancements.

At a Glance
14 Insights
58m 57s Duration
9 Topics
4 Concepts

Deep Dive Analysis

Soren Gordhamer's Childhood and Introduction to Meditation

Unconventional Path: Travel, College, and Spiritual Exploration

Teaching Meditation in Challenging Environments: Juvenile Halls

Connecting with Youth: The "Power Practice" Approach

The Genesis of Wisdom 2.0: Bridging Tech and Wisdom

Growth and Influence of the Wisdom 2.0 Conference

Navigating Critiques: Protests and "McMindfulness" Concerns

Soren's Vision for a Wisdom-Based Culture

The Loss and Need for Contemplative Time

Relating to Pain with Compassion

This concept involves acknowledging and working with one's own pain and suffering rather than fighting it. Soren learned this from Buddhist talks, finding relief in the idea that suffering could be approached with understanding and kindness, a perspective he hadn't encountered in his upbringing.

Power Practice

A meditation approach tailored for youth in challenging environments like juvenile halls. It reframes mindfulness as a tool for gaining personal power, enabling individuals to choose their responses to situations and avoid being manipulated by others, rather than being blindly driven by emotions.

Primary and Secondary Focus (Eckhart Tolle)

The primary focus is to be fully present and accepting of the current moment, as it is the only reality we truly possess. The secondary focus involves listening for what life wants to express or do through you as an action in the world, stemming from this state of presence.

Awareness (as an alternative to mindfulness)

Soren uses 'awareness' to describe an inherent human capacity to be awake and present, which he believes existed long before Buddhism and is not owned by any specific tradition. He sometimes prefers this term as 'mindfulness' has become widely used and can be misunderstood.

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How did Soren Gordhamer get into meditation?

Soren was drawn to meditation as a teenager after his parents' sudden divorce, experiencing deep grief and finding solace in Buddhist teachings that addressed pain, suffering, and the ability to relate to them with compassion.

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How did Soren teach meditation to kids in juvenile halls?

He adapted his approach by not calling it 'meditation' but rather 'tuning in,' and framed it as a 'power practice' that helps kids choose their responses to situations, giving them control over their actions rather than being played by others.

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What was the inspiration behind founding Wisdom 2.0?

While living in isolation after a divorce and job loss, Soren had a vision to bring together the mindfulness/wisdom world and the technology world, believing both needed each other to solve global problems and ensure internal technologies of love and compassion grew alongside external ones.

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What is the core mission of Wisdom 2.0?

Wisdom 2.0 aims to provide an annual gathering space for anyone interested in living with wisdom, mindfulness, and compassion in the modern digital age, fostering connection and learning about integrating spiritual teachings with technological advancements.

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How does Soren Gordhamer respond to criticisms of Wisdom 2.0, such as protests and concerns about 'McMindfulness'?

Soren understands the anger regarding wealth disparity and gentrification, wishing protesters had engaged in dialogue. For 'McMindfulness' concerns, he emphasizes that Wisdom 2.0 explores 'awareness,' an inherent human capacity for wakefulness that predates Buddhism and is not exclusive to any single tradition.

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What is Soren Gordhamer's vision for a wisdom-based culture?

He envisions a culture where social-emotional learning and compassion training are universal in schools, corporations prioritize connection and impact over quarterly profits, the elderly are cared for, and policies are developed from a sense of shared humanity and connectedness.

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Why is contemplative time becoming more challenging in modern society?

Unlike previous generations where contemplative time was naturally integrated into daily life without constant digital interruptions, the pervasive nature of modern technology means that contemplation is no longer built into the system and must be deliberately created.

1. Live with Presence and Purpose

Prioritize being fully present and accepting of the current moment as your primary focus, while simultaneously listening for what life wants to express or do through you as a secondary focus. This approach allows actions to emerge from a state of presence, rather than trying to ‘make better’ the present moment.

2. Understand Your Own Suffering

Engage in an inner process to deeply understand your own suffering and pain, as this self-awareness is essential for developing empathy. This understanding opens you up to genuinely feel and respond to the suffering and pain of others.

3. Offer Genuine Presence

Give others, especially children, the profound gift of your genuine presence and undivided attention, as this fosters deep connection and helps them feel truly seen and valued. This quality of attention can be more impactful than formal teachings or advice.

4. Create Contemplative Time

Actively establish dedicated ‘containers’ or spaces for contemplative time and mindfulness in your daily life, as modern society often lacks built-in opportunities for reflection. This practice is crucial for thoughtful decision-making and maintaining balance amidst increasing technological demands.

5. Balance Internal & External Growth

Prioritize the development of ‘internal technologies’ such as love, compassion, and wisdom to grow alongside external technological advancements. This ensures a balanced society where human connection and emotional intelligence are valued as much as technical skills.

6. Integrate Tech and Wisdom

Actively seek to combine external technological advancements with internal wisdom, mindfulness, and compassion. This synergy can address complex global problems more effectively by harnessing the best of both domains.

7. Frame Teachings to Audience Interests

When introducing new concepts or practices, especially to a challenging audience, frame them in terms of the audience’s existing interests and perceived needs. This approach increases engagement and relevance, making the message more accessible and impactful.

8. Meet People Where They Are

Be flexible and observant of what individuals are truly seeking, rather than imposing your own assumptions or agenda about what they ‘should’ be getting. Meet them at their point of need and provide what genuinely matters to them.

9. Use Humor to Soften Barriers

Employ humor and self-deprecation to create a relaxed atmosphere and make yourself more relatable and human, particularly when introducing serious topics to diverse audiences. This approach can break down barriers and enhance receptivity to your message.

10. Address Pain with Compassion

Seek out teachings and practices that directly address pain and suffering, learning to relate to these difficult emotions with compassion. This approach offers significant relief and provides a constructive way to work through personal challenges.

11. Listen for Soothing Voices

When seeking guidance or comfort, pay attention to the tone and presence of teachers or mentors, as a soothing voice can provide reassurance and a sense that things are manageable. This can be impactful even before fully grasping the content of the teachings.

12. Leverage Influence for Good

Utilize the platform and respect afforded to influential figures, such as business or technology leaders, to advocate for and promote values like mindfulness, wisdom, and compassion. Their endorsement can significantly amplify these messages for broader societal impact.

13. Reframe Criticism as Impact

When facing public criticism or protests, consider reframing these events as indicators of having achieved significant visibility or impact. This perspective can help maintain resilience and a broader understanding of your work’s reach.

14. Create a Family Sharing Circle

Establish a regular family gathering, such as a monthly or bimonthly ‘family circle,’ where everyone can openly share their life’s struggles and joys. This routine fosters a tight-knit and connected family dynamic.

My father had five kids and went and got his PhD, and I think he had this fantasy of living in India and going off and doing the spiritual quest, but he couldn't because he had five kids.

Soren Gordhamer

I remember feeling this just deep grief and this deep pain in my heart and not knowing what to do with it. And I remember just crying, you know, to sleep at night and asking, like, how do I live in a life where such change can happen without me even knowing that it was going to happen?

Soren Gordhamer

And I remember how relieving that was that there was actually a name for what I felt. That they talked about that. And they also talked about the ability to relate to pain and suffering with compassion, which is something I'd never heard growing up in Texas.

Soren Gordhamer

If whatever we're doing, if it doesn't work for everybody, then it doesn't, what we're doing is we're just deluding ourselves.

Soren Gordhamer

Thich Nhat Hanh says the greatest gift we can give another person is our presence.

Soren Gordhamer

Kids know where their love is.

Eleanor (Dan Harris's nanny)

Don't ask what you want to do in the world. Ask what the world wants to do through you.

Eckhart Tolle

How do we make sure that the internal technologies of love and compassion and wisdom grow alongside that so that we have a community and a group of children who not only know how to code and how to post things on Instagram, but they also know how to sit across from one another and have a conversation.

Soren Gordhamer

Well, congratulations, Soren, you've arrived, you've made it. When people can pro, when people like organize a protest against you, like you've made it.

Jack Kornfield

I'm making a bet that we need each of these subgroups in order to create something that actually has impact in the culture.

Soren Gordhamer
Almost 6'4"
Soren Gordhamer's height Specifically, 6'3 and 3/4"
6'6"
Soren Gordhamer's father's height Soren's father
28
Soren Gordhamer's age at college graduation Took an extended plan for college
4
Soren Gordhamer's son's age when Wisdom 2.0 started This was about 10 years ago from the time of the podcast
$500
Monthly rent for Soren Gordhamer when starting Wisdom 2.0 For a two-bedroom trailer in Northern New Mexico
Eighth year
Current year of Wisdom 2.0 conference At the time of the podcast recording
98.5%
Percentage of kids of color in NYC juvenile halls Observed by Soren while teaching there
18 minutes
Standard length of a TED Talk Mentioned in comparison to Wisdom 2.0's format