The Things Nobody's Talking To Jada Pinkett Smith About
Jada Pinkett Smith, artist and dedicated spiritual seeker, discusses her memoir "Worthy." She shares daily non-negotiables like meditation and connecting with a higher power, plus insights on surrendering ego, suffering with grace, and cultivating self-worth and loving boundaries.
Deep Dive Analysis
12 Topic Outline
Introduction to Jada Pinkett Smith's Spiritual Journey
Jada's Daily Non-Negotiable Spiritual Practices
Understanding the 'Great Supreme' and Ego Management
The Practice of Surrender and Peaceful Striving
The Deep Drive Behind Jada's Spiritual Seeking
Finding Meaning and Healing Beyond Material Success
The Sacredness of Suffering and Hitting Rock Bottom
Ram Dass's Teaching: Open Heart in Hell
How an Open Heart Provides True Safety
Setting Loving Boundaries vs. Angry Boundaries
The Meaning Behind the Book Title 'Worthy'
Navigating Book Publicity and Core Message
7 Key Concepts
The Great Supreme
Jada's term for God or universal source, a higher power. It's a personal understanding that helps her manage ego by shifting focus from self-centeredness to being in service of something greater, promoting the greater good over self-serving desires.
Surrender Practice
A daily practice of releasing the need to control outcomes or force things to happen, especially when the ego demands a specific result. It involves letting go and trusting that a higher, more intelligent energy has things under control, allowing for relaxation and flow.
Peaceful Striving
The balance between putting effort into life's endeavors and the wisdom of knowing that one cannot control everything. It's about trying hard while acknowledging the chaotic and mysterious nature of the universe, leading to a more serene approach to life.
Sacredness of Suffering
The idea that allowing oneself to sit with and experience intense feelings of grief, despair, and disappointment can lead to profound self-understanding and compassion for others. This process fosters connection, brings one closer to love, and helps realize that suffering is a universal human experience.
Open Heart in Hell
A concept from Ram Dass, meaning the ability to maintain an open and elastic heart in uncomfortable, painful, or confrontational situations. Instead of fighting or armoring up, it's about choosing love and a loving presence as the greatest shield, even when circumstances are not ideal.
Loving Boundaries
The practice of protecting one's peace and well-being not from a place of resentment, revenge, or anger, but from a foundation of self-love and personal development. It involves discerning the difference between necessary self-protection and reactive unkindness, ensuring boundaries are set with love.
Self-Worth (Worthy)
The internal feeling of value and significance to oneself, distinct from seeking validation or worthiness from others. Cultivating self-worth allows an individual to care less about external opinions and send love from a 'full cup' rather than a needy place.
10 Questions Answered
She wakes around 5 AM for sitting or walking meditation, engages in physical activity like Qigong or yoga, reads scripture, and strives to live through her relationship with the 'Great Supreme'.
She defines it as God or a universal source, a power higher than herself, which she views as vast and having many forms and faces, allowing individuals to envision what it means for them personally.
By recognizing that self-centeredness can make one believe they are all that exists, staying in contact with the Great Supreme helps her use her energies to be in service to something far greater than herself, focusing on the greater good over self-serving desires.
It's a practice of releasing and letting go in moments when her ego wants to act, push, or make something happen, especially when seeking a specific outcome, trusting that a higher intelligence has things under control.
Despite having material success, clout, and fame, she felt spiritually deprived and that these external achievements did not nourish the void within her heart or heal her brokenness, driving her search for true happiness and deeper meaning.
Hitting a dark place around age 40 where she contemplated ending her life, she realized it was an extreme circumstance necessary to get her on her current spiritual path, and she is now grateful for that experience.
By allowing oneself to sit with the intense feelings of grief, despair, and disappointment, suffering can lead to compassion, understanding that others also suffer, and realizing one is not alone, ultimately bringing one closer to love and authentic connection.
An open heart allows one to be elastic in uncomfortable situations, surrendering the fight response and choosing love, which Jada believes acts as the greatest shield by dissolving the illusion of hate and recognizing that much of it is projected self-hatred.
No, having an open heart does not mean unconditional tolerance; it means protecting one's peace and setting fierce, loving boundaries, distinguishing them from boundaries set from anger, resentment, or revenge.
The title reflects the universal search for self-worth and value to oneself, independent of others' opinions, and serves as a reminder to readers that they are inherently worthy.
13 Actionable Insights
1. Cultivate Higher Power Connection
Cultivate a deep relationship with a higher power (Great Supreme/God/universal source) and filter all life decisions, relationships, and work through this connection to manage ego and serve a greater good.
2. Practice Daily Surrender
Practice surrender by releasing and letting go in moments when the ego pushes to make something happen or seeks a specific outcome, trusting a higher intelligence to guide the flow of events. Balance intense effort with the wisdom of knowing you cannot control everything, aiming for ‘peaceful striving’.
3. Embrace Suffering with Grace
Understand that suffering is a sacred and inherent part of the human experience, and learn to sit with intense feelings of grief, despair, and disappointment to cultivate compassion for yourself and others. This process brings you closer to love and authentic connection.
4. Open Your Heart in Adversity
Learn to keep an open and ’elastic’ heart even in uncomfortable or ‘hellish’ situations, surrendering the ego’s urge to fight when attacked or faced with pain. Choose to respond to hatred and aggression with an open heart to avoid perpetuating negativity.
5. Set Loving Boundaries
Understand that having an open heart does not mean unconditional tolerance; it is crucial to protect your peace by setting clear boundaries. Develop personally to learn to set these boundaries from a place of love and self-care, rather than from anger, resentment, or hate.
6. Build Intrinsic Self-Worth
Focus on cultivating self-worth for yourself, rather than seeking validation or a sense of worthiness from others. A strong sense of self-worth reduces concern about others’ opinions and allows you to give love from a place of abundance.
7. Confront Your Inner Turmoil
Drop ego walls and examine the ‘shadows’ of your own heart and psyche to understand your own behaviors and inner turmoil. This deep self-awareness allows you to empathize with others and avoid taking their negativity personally.
8. Establish a Morning Routine
Wake up early (around 5 AM) to meditate (sitting or walking), engage in physical activity like Qigong or yoga, and read scripture of some kind daily. These practices serve as non-negotiable foundations for spiritual and physical well-being.
9. Seek Beyond Material Success
Recognize that material success, clout, and fame do not equate to true happiness or nourish an existential void. Seek deeper spiritual understanding and meaning beyond worldly achievements.
10. Explore Diverse Spiritual Paths
Be open to studying different spiritual practices and traditions, as each can offer unique gifts and understandings of a higher power. This continuous exploration enhances and nourishes life.
11. Reframe Rock Bottoms
View rock bottoms and extreme circumstances as necessary catalysts that can force you onto a new, more beneficial path. Be grateful for these difficult experiences if you can survive them.
12. Don’t Personalize Others’ Hate
Recognize that much of the hate and negativity projected by others stems from their own self-hatred and lack of self-love. Therefore, do not take it personally, but rather have compassion for their internal struggles.
13. Contribute to World Sanity
Engage in personal processes to confront your own ‘ugliness’ and inner turmoil, as this self-work makes you a better person and increases the quotient of sanity in the world. This individual effort also leads to personal happiness.
7 Key Quotes
Peaceful striving is where it's at.
Jada Pinkett Smith
I'm not that intelligent to always know what the best outcome should be and that the Great Supreme has it all. And so I can just relax and let go.
Jada Pinkett Smith
Love is the greatest shield.
Jada Pinkett Smith
We have to learn how to have an open heart in hell.
Ram Dass (quoted by Jada Pinkett Smith)
Having an open heart, you know, to me, I've learned it's created the greatest safety. It's like it envelops and it dissolves and softens all of the, it makes the hate of the world not non-existent as if it's not here, but non-existent in the fact that it's not necessarily real.
Jada Pinkett Smith
Just because love itself might not always be so loud, it is far more potent than how loud negative energy can be.
Jada Pinkett Smith
I'm all love and light and a little bit of go fuck yourself.
Dan Harris (quoting a bumper sticker)
1 Protocols
Jada Pinkett Smith's Daily Non-Negotiables
Jada Pinkett Smith- Wake up around 5 a.m.
- Meditate (sitting or walking).
- Engage in some kind of physical activity (Qigong or yoga).
- Read some scripture.
- Live life through the understanding and connection with 'The Great Supreme'.