Values, principles, and behavior change (with Eric Zimmer)

Nov 15, 2023 1h 3m 47 insights Episode Page ↗
Spencer Greenberg speaks with Eric Zimmer, host of The One You Feed podcast, about intrinsic values, personal principles, and behavior change. They discuss how to identify and live by one's values, navigate value conflicts, and apply behavior change frameworks for personal growth.
Actionable Insights

1. Feed Your Good Wolf

Recognize that in life, two opposing forces (good and bad wolves) are always at battle within you. The one you choose to nurture through your actions and focus will ultimately grow stronger.

2. Live By Intrinsic Values

Identify your intrinsic values—those things you value for their own sake, not as a means to an end. Then, intentionally structure your life and actions to effectively create more of those intrinsically valued things.

3. Diagnose Behavior Change Gaps

If a desired behavior change isn’t happening, use a framework like the ‘10 Conditions for Change’ (available on clearerthinking.org) as a diagnostic tool. Pinpoint which specific conditions are not being met to address the root cause.

4. Seek Third Options

When faced with a difficult decision involving conflicting values, actively search for a ’third option’ or alternative solution. This approach can often satisfy both sets of values, rather than getting stuck on apparent dichotomies.

5. Uncover True Motivations

When pursuing a goal, dig deeper to identify the underlying intrinsic value (e.g., freedom, connection) rather than focusing on instrumental values (e.g., money). This reveals more diverse and effective strategies to achieve what you truly want.

6. Establish Life Principles

Develop a preset set of personal principles, which are rules of thumb or decision-making strategies, to guide your life. This makes decisions faster and helps you consistently live by your values.

7. Identify Core Values

Reflect on the underlying values (e.g., fear, helping others, happiness) that guide your decisions. Understanding these is crucial for living a life aligned with what truly matters to you.

8. Form Concrete Intentions

Transform abstract desires into concrete intentions by specifying exactly what you will do, when, and where (e.g., ‘I’m going to start the gym on Monday at 7 AM at X gym’). This moves beyond mere wanting to actual planning.

9. Replace Undesired Habits

Instead of trying to simply stop an unhealthy habit, focus on replacing it with a new, healthier behavior. This strategy is often more effective, especially if the new behavior satisfies the same underlying need.

10. Master Habit Recreation

Recognize that habit formation is an ongoing process, not a one-time event, as life changes will inevitably disrupt routines. Cultivate the skill of recreating habits after disruptions.

11. Clarify Values in Conflict

When facing a difficult decision or problem, explicitly identify all the intrinsic values at stake for yourself or others. This clarification makes trade-offs apparent and aids in informed decision-making.

12. Continuously Balance Values

View the process of aligning with your values as an ongoing, dynamic act of balancing. Regularly check if you’re leaning too heavily into one area and adjust course as needed.

13. Identify Unhelpful Behavior’s Purpose

Recognize that unhelpful behaviors often serve an underlying, helpful purpose (e.g., addiction providing a feeling of aliveness). Identify this purpose to then seek alternative, healthier ways to meet that need.

14. Question Life Strategies

Challenge long-held life strategies (e.g., career paths, educational choices) by asking ‘why’ you’re pursuing them. Understanding the underlying intrinsic values can reveal alternative, more effective paths to fulfillment.

15. Tune Into Value-Aligned Satisfaction

Actively tune into and recognize the quiet satisfaction that comes from living by your values and doing what you said you would do. This positive reinforcement aids in behavior change maintenance.

16. Proactively Maintain Conditions

For long-term behavior maintenance, proactively identify which of the ‘10 Conditions for Change’ are most likely to lapse (e.g., remembering, desiring). Develop strategies to prevent them from disappearing.

17. Tailor Behavior Change Strategy

Customize your behavior change strategy by reflecting on your personal history and identifying what specific challenges (e.g., forgetting, losing motivation) are most likely to derail your efforts, rather than using a one-size-fits-all approach.

18. Combine Reflective and Intuitive Desire

Aim to have both reflective (logical, long-term benefits) and intuitive (immediate, pleasurable rewards) desires for a behavior. This dual motivation is most effective for consistency.

19. Implement “If-Then” Plans

Develop implementation intentions, which are ‘if-then’ plans (e.g., ‘If I am hard on myself, then I will think a self-compassionate thought’). This helps to pre-decide your response to specific triggers.

20. Use Principles for Value Alignment

Establish clear principles (e.g., ‘don’t lie’) as pre-decided rules to prevent temptation and external factors from pushing you into actions that are not aligned with your core values.

21. Adopt a Long-Term Value View

When making a decision that requires sacrificing one value for another, consider the larger picture. Think about how you might promote the temporarily sacrificed value in a different way or at a later time.

22. Engage in Ongoing Value Reflection

Regularly engage in consistent and ongoing reflection about what truly matters to you. Living a values-based life requires continuous self-understanding to avoid getting stuck on unconscious tracks.

23. Reflect on Past Successes

When planning behavior change, reflect on past habits you’ve successfully formed. Identify what strategies worked for you then and adapt them to your current goals.

24. Create Environmental Triggers

For new mental or emotional habits (e.g., self-compassion), start with simple environmental triggers (e.g., reflecting every time you enter the kitchen). This keeps the habit top of mind before progressing to more advanced emotional triggers.

25. Satiate Unsatisfied Values

Address values that are not being met, as they tend to exert a powerful, overpowering pull. Consciously work to satisfy these values to bring them back into balance and reduce their intense demand.

26. Find Alternative Aliveness Sources

Discover and engage in activities (e.g., creating art, experiencing beauty) that make you feel alive. Learn to tolerate periods of lower mood without reacting, trusting that these feelings will pass.

27. Prioritize Learning and Growth

Embrace the intrinsic value of continuous learning and personal growth throughout your life. This is a common and fulfilling pursuit, especially as you age.

28. Aspire to Want Fundamentally

Strive to want things that align with your fundamental, deeper values rather than superficial desires. Achieve this by getting clear on your real values, recognizing value traps, and avoiding autopilot.

29. Distinguish Principles from Values

Understand that principles are rules of thumb or decision-making strategies, while intrinsic values are the ultimate things you are seeking. Principles serve to help you live by your values.

30. Structure Behavior Change in Phases

Approach behavior change by dividing it into three distinct phases: the decision to engage, taking a series of actions, and long-term maintenance. Address each phase systematically for greater success.

31. Consider the Behavior

Ensure you have consciously considered the desired behavior change. If you’ve literally never thought about it, it’s almost certainly not going to occur.

32. Cultivate Desire for Behavior

Develop a genuine desire for the behavior, understanding that both intuitive (e.g., ‘I want that cupcake’) and reflective (e.g., ‘I should exercise for health’) desires are important for motivation.

33. Stoke Desire with Beliefs

Stoke your desire for a behavior by connecting it to a deeply held value (e.g., health) and believing that the behavior is an effective and necessary means to achieve that value.

34. Connect Behavior to Immediate Reward

Identify and focus on the immediate, intuitive rewards of a desired behavior (e.g., improved mood from exercise) to strengthen motivation and shift it from purely reflective to also intuitive.

35. Choose Enjoyable Exercise

If you dislike a particular form of exercise, choose a different type that provides more immediate enjoyment and reward. This makes it easier to maintain consistency.

36. Be Specific with Intentions

Ensure your intentions are highly specific (e.g., ‘Monday morning, I’m doing X for Y long’) to move past procrastination and make an actual, actionable choice.

37. Address Forgetting Behaviors

Recognize that forgetting is a common barrier to behavior change. Implement simple reminders to ensure you remember to perform the desired action.

38. Use Simple Reminders

Employ basic strategies like getting an accountability buddy, writing physical reminders, or setting alarms to overcome forgetting and increase compliance with new behaviors.

39. Anchor Habits to Objects

Choose a specific object in your home environment (e.g., a mirror) and commit to performing a desired action (e.g., mindfulness, gratitude) every time you pass or interact with that object.

40. Match Replacement Behavior’s Goal

When replacing an undesired habit, ensure the new behavior genuinely satisfies the same underlying goal or need as the original habit. For example, if the old habit relieved boredom, the new one should too.

41. Apply Past Habit Successes

Recall a past habit you successfully formed, identify the specific actions or strategies that led to its success. Then, write down how to apply those same methods to your current desired habit.

42. Leverage Behavioral Momentum

Understand that consistent engagement in a behavior builds momentum, making it much easier to continue. This is true even if it doesn’t become a fully automatic habit, especially for varied or complex actions.

43. Recognize Value Activation

Understand that not all your values will be equally active at all times. Some will come up more frequently than others in different life situations.

44. Take Intrinsic Values Test

Utilize the free intrinsic values test on clearerthinking.org to help identify your core intrinsic values and gain deeper self-understanding.

45. Understand Your Existing Values

Focus on understanding and exploring the values you already possess, rather than trying to consciously choose or change them. They are often deeply ingrained aspects of your being.

46. Adopt “Help the World” Principle

Consider adopting the principle of always trying to help the world insofar as you are able. This can serve as a guiding rule for your life and actions.

47. Adopt “Leave Better” Principle

Strive to leave every situation, person, or place you encounter better than you found it. This can be a guiding principle for your interactions and impact.