Values, principles, and behavior change (with Eric Zimmer)
Spencer Greenberg speaks with Eric Zimmer, host of The One You Feed podcast, about intrinsic values, personal principles, and behavior change. They discuss how to identify and live by one's values, navigate value conflicts, and apply behavior change frameworks for personal growth.
Deep Dive Analysis
14 Topic Outline
Introduction to the Two Wolves Parable
Connecting the Parable to Underlying Values
Navigating Conflicting Intrinsic Values
The Philosophy of Valuism: Intrinsic vs. Instrumental Values
Addiction as a Conflict of Values
Finding Aliveness and Satisfaction Without Addiction
Resolving Value Conflicts and Finding Third Options
The Origin and Evolution of Intrinsic Values
Distinguishing Between Values and Principles
Motivation for Studying Behavior Change
The 10 Conditions for Behavior Change Framework
Desire and Intention in Behavior Change
The Action Phase: Remembering and Replacing Habits
Maintaining Behavior Change and Adapting to Disruptions
9 Key Concepts
Intrinsic Values
These are things we value for their own sake, not as a means to an end. They represent the fundamental 'why' behind our desires, offering a broader range of strategies to achieve what truly matters to us.
Instrumental Values
These are things we value because they serve as a means to an end, helping us achieve something else rather than being desired for themselves. For example, money is often an instrumental value, desired for what it can procure.
Valuism
This is a life philosophy centered on identifying one's intrinsic values and then deliberately living in a way that effectively generates more of those valued things, utilizing efficient and proven methods.
Value Trap
This occurs when an individual pursues an instrumental value as if it were an intrinsic one, often continuing to chase it long after it ceases to genuinely serve their deeper, more fundamental values, potentially to the detriment of other life areas.
Principles
These are rules of thumb or pre-decided decision-making strategies that simplify choices and help align actions with one's intrinsic values. They act as heuristics, guiding behavior without requiring constant re-evaluation of every situation.
10 Conditions for Change Framework
A comprehensive framework for behavior change that outlines 10 conditions, across decision, action, and maintenance phases, which, if all met, make a desired behavior change highly probable. It functions as a diagnostic tool to identify why a behavior change might not be occurring.
Intuitive Desire
This refers to an immediate, visceral wanting for something, such as the craving for a delicious cupcake. It is often driven by immediate gratification or sensory appeal.
Reflective Desire
This type of desire stems from a conscious evaluation of pros and cons, leading to a reasoned decision that a particular action or outcome is beneficial or necessary. An example is deciding to exercise for long-term health benefits.
Implementation Intentions
This is a strategy for behavior change where a specific plan is formulated: when a particular trigger or situation occurs, a predetermined action will be taken. This helps bridge the gap between intending to do something and actually doing it.
8 Questions Answered
The parable illustrates that our internal battles between positive and negative aspects of ourselves are influenced by what we choose to 'feed.' It emphasizes that understanding and aligning with our underlying values is crucial for guiding our decisions and shaping our lives.
Intrinsic values are not actively chosen; rather, they are inherent aspects of our being, shaped by a combination of genetics, upbringing, and culture. By mid-adulthood, these values often solidify, making the process more about self-discovery and understanding than deliberate alteration.
Intrinsic values are the ultimate ends we seek for their own sake, representing what we fundamentally care about. Principles, on the other hand, are practical rules of thumb or pre-decided strategies that guide our decision-making and help us live in alignment with those intrinsic values.
Behavior change is challenging because individuals often struggle to translate their desires and intentions into consistent action. Many difficulties arise from an inability to overcome internal resistance, forgetfulness, or a lack of clear, actionable plans.
For effective behavior change, 10 conditions must be met across three phases: decision, action, and maintenance. These include having considered the behavior, genuinely desiring it (both intuitively and reflectively), forming a concrete intention, remembering to act, and having strategies to sustain the behavior over time.
To foster persistent behavior change, it's crucial to identify and connect with the immediate positive feelings or satisfaction derived from the new behavior. Additionally, recognizing that habits require ongoing recreation and adaptation in response to life's inevitable disruptions is key, rather than expecting them to become permanently automatic.
When faced with conflicting values or tough decisions, a valuable strategy is to explicitly identify all the values at stake and then actively search for a 'third option' that might satisfy multiple values, rather than feeling confined to a binary choice. Considering the decision within a larger life context, where one value might be promoted in alternative ways, can also be helpful.
To initiate a new behavior such as self-compassion, it's effective to create 'implementation intentions' by linking the desired action to specific environmental cues (e.g., reflecting on self-compassion when entering a particular room) or emotional triggers (e.g., practicing self-compassion when noticing self-criticism).
47 Actionable Insights
1. Feed Your Good Wolf
Recognize that in life, two opposing forces (good and bad wolves) are always at battle within you. The one you choose to nurture through your actions and focus will ultimately grow stronger.
2. Live By Intrinsic Values
Identify your intrinsic values—those things you value for their own sake, not as a means to an end. Then, intentionally structure your life and actions to effectively create more of those intrinsically valued things.
3. Diagnose Behavior Change Gaps
If a desired behavior change isn’t happening, use a framework like the ‘10 Conditions for Change’ (available on clearerthinking.org) as a diagnostic tool. Pinpoint which specific conditions are not being met to address the root cause.
4. Seek Third Options
When faced with a difficult decision involving conflicting values, actively search for a ’third option’ or alternative solution. This approach can often satisfy both sets of values, rather than getting stuck on apparent dichotomies.
5. Uncover True Motivations
When pursuing a goal, dig deeper to identify the underlying intrinsic value (e.g., freedom, connection) rather than focusing on instrumental values (e.g., money). This reveals more diverse and effective strategies to achieve what you truly want.
6. Establish Life Principles
Develop a preset set of personal principles, which are rules of thumb or decision-making strategies, to guide your life. This makes decisions faster and helps you consistently live by your values.
7. Identify Core Values
Reflect on the underlying values (e.g., fear, helping others, happiness) that guide your decisions. Understanding these is crucial for living a life aligned with what truly matters to you.
8. Form Concrete Intentions
Transform abstract desires into concrete intentions by specifying exactly what you will do, when, and where (e.g., ‘I’m going to start the gym on Monday at 7 AM at X gym’). This moves beyond mere wanting to actual planning.
9. Replace Undesired Habits
Instead of trying to simply stop an unhealthy habit, focus on replacing it with a new, healthier behavior. This strategy is often more effective, especially if the new behavior satisfies the same underlying need.
10. Master Habit Recreation
Recognize that habit formation is an ongoing process, not a one-time event, as life changes will inevitably disrupt routines. Cultivate the skill of recreating habits after disruptions.
11. Clarify Values in Conflict
When facing a difficult decision or problem, explicitly identify all the intrinsic values at stake for yourself or others. This clarification makes trade-offs apparent and aids in informed decision-making.
12. Continuously Balance Values
View the process of aligning with your values as an ongoing, dynamic act of balancing. Regularly check if you’re leaning too heavily into one area and adjust course as needed.
13. Identify Unhelpful Behavior’s Purpose
Recognize that unhelpful behaviors often serve an underlying, helpful purpose (e.g., addiction providing a feeling of aliveness). Identify this purpose to then seek alternative, healthier ways to meet that need.
14. Question Life Strategies
Challenge long-held life strategies (e.g., career paths, educational choices) by asking ‘why’ you’re pursuing them. Understanding the underlying intrinsic values can reveal alternative, more effective paths to fulfillment.
15. Tune Into Value-Aligned Satisfaction
Actively tune into and recognize the quiet satisfaction that comes from living by your values and doing what you said you would do. This positive reinforcement aids in behavior change maintenance.
16. Proactively Maintain Conditions
For long-term behavior maintenance, proactively identify which of the ‘10 Conditions for Change’ are most likely to lapse (e.g., remembering, desiring). Develop strategies to prevent them from disappearing.
17. Tailor Behavior Change Strategy
Customize your behavior change strategy by reflecting on your personal history and identifying what specific challenges (e.g., forgetting, losing motivation) are most likely to derail your efforts, rather than using a one-size-fits-all approach.
18. Combine Reflective and Intuitive Desire
Aim to have both reflective (logical, long-term benefits) and intuitive (immediate, pleasurable rewards) desires for a behavior. This dual motivation is most effective for consistency.
19. Implement “If-Then” Plans
Develop implementation intentions, which are ‘if-then’ plans (e.g., ‘If I am hard on myself, then I will think a self-compassionate thought’). This helps to pre-decide your response to specific triggers.
20. Use Principles for Value Alignment
Establish clear principles (e.g., ‘don’t lie’) as pre-decided rules to prevent temptation and external factors from pushing you into actions that are not aligned with your core values.
21. Adopt a Long-Term Value View
When making a decision that requires sacrificing one value for another, consider the larger picture. Think about how you might promote the temporarily sacrificed value in a different way or at a later time.
22. Engage in Ongoing Value Reflection
Regularly engage in consistent and ongoing reflection about what truly matters to you. Living a values-based life requires continuous self-understanding to avoid getting stuck on unconscious tracks.
23. Reflect on Past Successes
When planning behavior change, reflect on past habits you’ve successfully formed. Identify what strategies worked for you then and adapt them to your current goals.
24. Create Environmental Triggers
For new mental or emotional habits (e.g., self-compassion), start with simple environmental triggers (e.g., reflecting every time you enter the kitchen). This keeps the habit top of mind before progressing to more advanced emotional triggers.
25. Satiate Unsatisfied Values
Address values that are not being met, as they tend to exert a powerful, overpowering pull. Consciously work to satisfy these values to bring them back into balance and reduce their intense demand.
26. Find Alternative Aliveness Sources
Discover and engage in activities (e.g., creating art, experiencing beauty) that make you feel alive. Learn to tolerate periods of lower mood without reacting, trusting that these feelings will pass.
27. Prioritize Learning and Growth
Embrace the intrinsic value of continuous learning and personal growth throughout your life. This is a common and fulfilling pursuit, especially as you age.
28. Aspire to Want Fundamentally
Strive to want things that align with your fundamental, deeper values rather than superficial desires. Achieve this by getting clear on your real values, recognizing value traps, and avoiding autopilot.
29. Distinguish Principles from Values
Understand that principles are rules of thumb or decision-making strategies, while intrinsic values are the ultimate things you are seeking. Principles serve to help you live by your values.
30. Structure Behavior Change in Phases
Approach behavior change by dividing it into three distinct phases: the decision to engage, taking a series of actions, and long-term maintenance. Address each phase systematically for greater success.
31. Consider the Behavior
Ensure you have consciously considered the desired behavior change. If you’ve literally never thought about it, it’s almost certainly not going to occur.
32. Cultivate Desire for Behavior
Develop a genuine desire for the behavior, understanding that both intuitive (e.g., ‘I want that cupcake’) and reflective (e.g., ‘I should exercise for health’) desires are important for motivation.
33. Stoke Desire with Beliefs
Stoke your desire for a behavior by connecting it to a deeply held value (e.g., health) and believing that the behavior is an effective and necessary means to achieve that value.
34. Connect Behavior to Immediate Reward
Identify and focus on the immediate, intuitive rewards of a desired behavior (e.g., improved mood from exercise) to strengthen motivation and shift it from purely reflective to also intuitive.
35. Choose Enjoyable Exercise
If you dislike a particular form of exercise, choose a different type that provides more immediate enjoyment and reward. This makes it easier to maintain consistency.
36. Be Specific with Intentions
Ensure your intentions are highly specific (e.g., ‘Monday morning, I’m doing X for Y long’) to move past procrastination and make an actual, actionable choice.
37. Address Forgetting Behaviors
Recognize that forgetting is a common barrier to behavior change. Implement simple reminders to ensure you remember to perform the desired action.
38. Use Simple Reminders
Employ basic strategies like getting an accountability buddy, writing physical reminders, or setting alarms to overcome forgetting and increase compliance with new behaviors.
39. Anchor Habits to Objects
Choose a specific object in your home environment (e.g., a mirror) and commit to performing a desired action (e.g., mindfulness, gratitude) every time you pass or interact with that object.
40. Match Replacement Behavior’s Goal
When replacing an undesired habit, ensure the new behavior genuinely satisfies the same underlying goal or need as the original habit. For example, if the old habit relieved boredom, the new one should too.
41. Apply Past Habit Successes
Recall a past habit you successfully formed, identify the specific actions or strategies that led to its success. Then, write down how to apply those same methods to your current desired habit.
42. Leverage Behavioral Momentum
Understand that consistent engagement in a behavior builds momentum, making it much easier to continue. This is true even if it doesn’t become a fully automatic habit, especially for varied or complex actions.
43. Recognize Value Activation
Understand that not all your values will be equally active at all times. Some will come up more frequently than others in different life situations.
44. Take Intrinsic Values Test
Utilize the free intrinsic values test on clearerthinking.org to help identify your core intrinsic values and gain deeper self-understanding.
45. Understand Your Existing Values
Focus on understanding and exploring the values you already possess, rather than trying to consciously choose or change them. They are often deeply ingrained aspects of your being.
46. Adopt “Help the World” Principle
Consider adopting the principle of always trying to help the world insofar as you are able. This can serve as a guiding rule for your life and actions.
47. Adopt “Leave Better” Principle
Strive to leave every situation, person, or place you encounter better than you found it. This can be a guiding principle for your interactions and impact.
5 Key Quotes
In life, there are two wolves inside of us that are always at battle. One is a good wolf, which represents things like kindness and bravery and love. And the other is a bad wolf, which represents things like greed and hatred and fear... And the grandparent says the one you feed.
Grandparent (from parable)
If I think that what I want is a cupcake, there's only one answer for that. It's a cupcake. If what I recognize that I really want is not to be bored or not to be sad, or there's a lot of ways to get to that.
Ginny (Eric Zimmer's partner)
It's like life is in black and white. And when I drink, it turns to color.
Lead character in 'Days of Wine and Roses' (quoted by Eric Zimmer)
Self-development is about learning to want better things.
Unattributed (quoted by Eric Zimmer)
It's often easier to replace a habit than to just erase something.
Spencer Greenberg
2 Protocols
Diagnosing Behavior Change Obstacles (10 Conditions for Change Framework)
Spencer Greenberg- Divide the behavior change process into three phases: Decision, Action, and Maintenance.
- Identify the 10 specific conditions that, if all met, make a desired behavior change highly likely to occur.
- If a desired behavior change is not happening, use the framework as a diagnostic tool to pinpoint which one or more of the 10 conditions are currently unmet.
- Develop and implement strategies specifically designed to address and meet the identified unmet conditions.
Habit Reflection for Success
Spencer Greenberg- Recall a habit you have successfully formed and maintained in the past.
- Reflect on the specific actions, strategies, or circumstances that contributed to your success with that past habit.
- Write down how you can adapt and apply those successful strategies to the current habit you are trying to form or maintain.
- Implement the adapted strategies to increase your likelihood of success with the new habit.