E29: Build Sandcastles out of Bullsh*t

Apr 3, 2019 50m 36s 15 insights
This episode explores the impact of algorithms and social media on well-being, the importance of modernizing mental health support, distinguishing emotions from disorders, and a six-step guide to transforming adversity. It also delves into the value of authenticity, intrinsic motivation, and a present-moment focus for personal growth and happiness.
Actionable Insights

1. Curate Your Digital Environment

Actively unfollow or mute social media accounts that promote extrinsic values (e.g., shallow content, external validation) as they negatively impact happiness and mental health. Replace them with inspiring, informative accounts that align with the person you aspire to be.

2. Prioritize Intrinsic Values

Focus on doing things for the inherent enjoyment of the task itself (intrinsic motivation), as science shows this leads to greater happiness and fulfillment compared to pursuing external rewards or approval.

3. Retrain Your Algorithms

Actively engage with motivational, inspirational, and informative content on platforms like YouTube to retrain algorithms, ensuring you are served valuable content rather than shallow or time-wasting material.

4. Embrace ‘No’ as a Catalyst

View rejection or being told ’no’ as life’s way of asking how badly you want something; use it as motivation to try harder and persist towards your goals.

5. Be Slow to Self-Label Emotions

Avoid quickly labeling normal human emotions like sadness or nervousness as clinical disorders (e.g., depression, anxiety disorder) based on temporary feelings or social media trends, and allow medical professionals to provide diagnoses.

6. Confront Emotions Directly

When facing difficult situations, allow yourself to confront and feel your emotions, including sadness and crying, rather than faking optimism or compartmentalizing, which can lead to future mental health issues.

7. Maintain Discipline and Structure in Adversity

Even during tough times, maintain daily discipline and structure (e.g., work, exercise) to provide a sense of normalcy and keep you sane, preventing a complete collapse of routine.

8. Find Humor in Difficult Situations

Utilize humor to cope with traumatic experiences, as it helps you connect with your humanity, ridicule situations beyond your control, and bring a sense of optimism.

9. Celebrate Small Victories

Actively seek out and celebrate any existing victories or silver linings, no matter how small, even when experiencing significant loss or hardship.

10. Pay It Forward to Improve Your Mood

In times of personal hardship, help others or contribute to a cause, as this act of paying it forward is a proven method to improve your own emotional state and happiness.

11. Reject the ‘Special’ Mindset

Stop believing you are inherently special or that the rules of the world don’t apply to you, as this mindset can foster ego, hinder learning, and lead to blaming external factors for your failures. Instead, recognize you are unique and capable, but success requires hard work like everyone else.

12. Live Authentically

Strive to be your true self, express your thoughts and feelings without fear of criticism or conforming, and do things for intrinsic reasons rather than external approval; this leads to greater happiness, creativity, conviction, and reduced anxiety.

13. Double Down on Your Strengths

Honestly assess your strengths and weaknesses, then dedicate more time and energy to activities that align with your natural talents and who you are, rather than trying to fake competence in areas where you are not strong.

14. Focus on Your Best in the Present

Concentrate on doing your absolute best every single day and in the present moment, avoiding excessive worry about past mistakes or future uncertainties, which can lead to anxiety and reduced productivity.

15. Cultivate a Mission-Driven Life

Identify and pursue a multi-faceted mission that connects your personal growth, business endeavors, and desire to make a positive impact on the world, as this sense of purpose can sustain you through sacrifices.