E44: The lessons we MUST learn before 2020.

Dec 23, 2019 41m 40s 9 insights
This episode features Stephen Bartlett reflecting on key lessons from his diary for the new year. He shares insights on prioritizing what truly matters, fostering team productivity through social norms, and the importance of self-awareness in personal growth and relationships.
Actionable Insights

1. Stop Catching Rocks

Cease expending energy, emotion, and time on meaningless, worthless things like internet trolls or passive-aggressive comments. Instead, focus your efforts on ‘big fish’ – the truly valuable pursuits that matter in the finite context of your life.

2. Cultivate Social Norms in Teams

Increase loyalty, engagement, and productivity within teams, groups, and relationships by fostering social norms like gratitude and reciprocity, rather than relying solely on transactional market norms. This approach requires genuine, mutual reciprocation.

3. Prioritize Happiness Over History

Be willing to walk away from people, even close friends or family, who cause significant emotional harm, prioritizing your present happiness over historical ties. This difficult decision can be essential for your well-being.

4. Challenge Self-Labels & Seek Context

Avoid labeling yourself or others (e.g., lazy, procrastinator) as these can become self-fulfilling prophecies. Instead, seek to understand the underlying context or psychological barriers causing behavior, which is key to overcoming issues and fostering freedom.

5. Reduce Your Comparison Circle

Combat feelings of inadequacy, inferiority, and misery by reducing your circle of comparison, both in real life and digitally. Curate your social media to unfollow people who promote shallow or superficial values that lead to unhealthy relative comparisons.

6. Embrace Change as Opportunity

View change, whether in business or personal life, with excitement rather than fear. Change closes one door but swings open new, often more valuable, opportunities, making adaptation a crucial and beneficial strategy.

7. Don’t Fear Being Copied

Recognize that while people may copy your actions, they cannot replicate your true, raw, and unmimicable inspiration or inherent value. Avoid wasting energy complaining about being copied, as anything easily copied is not truly valuable.

8. Take Responsibility for Relationship Patterns

In your romantic life, take responsibility for your own patterns and underlying issues through self-awareness and self-development, rather than blaming others. This is the only way to break cycles of disappointment and become ’the right person’ for a healthy relationship.

9. Be Conscious of Language and Actions

As a leader, be extremely conscious and careful about the words you use and the actions you exhibit, especially in today’s sensitive climate. This heightened awareness is crucial for navigating social dynamics and upholding personal values.