'Do We Even Have Fun Anymore?' A Listener's Story of Funterventions
Inspired by Dr. Laurie Santos, Natalie Robinson and her running club friends implemented "fun interventions" to inject more playfulness and connection into their busy adult lives. They share how structuring these activities helped them prioritize fun and deepen friendships.
Deep Dive Analysis
16 Topic Outline
Host's Personal Quest to Reclaim Fun
Introduction to the Franklin Running Club
The Running Club's Evolution and Deepening Friendships
Inspiration for 'Fun-terventions' from The Happiness Lab
The Concept of a 'Fun Audit' and Identifying Personal Fun Factors
Establishing Rules and Structure for Fun-terventions
Early Examples of Fun-tervention Activities
The Value of Pushing Comfort Zones for Fun
Examples of Challenging and Unlikely Fun-tervention Activities
The Role of Group Camaraderie and Non-Judgment
Benefits of Structured Fun for Social Connection
Cultivating Playfulness and Silliness in Group Activities
Fun Interventions Deepening Friendships and Providing Support
Advice for Starting Your Own Fun Interventions
Navigating Diverse Preferences for Fun Activities
Inspiring Others: The Ripple Effect of Fun-terventions
5 Key Concepts
Fun Audit
A process of reflecting on past experiences where you had the most fun, considering what you were doing, who you were with, and where you were, to identify your personal 'fun factors' or the elements that truly bring you joy.
Fun-terventions
Structured, regular, and often elaborate interventions planned by a group of friends to intentionally inject more fun into their adult lives, prioritizing social connection, playfulness, and activities that make time fly by.
Playfulness, Connection, Flow
These are identified as three key components that, when combined, create a uniquely enjoyable and deeply satisfying experience. Playfulness involves being goofy and not caring about failure, connection refers to shared experiences with others, and flow is the state of losing track of time in an activity.
Little Delights
A concept encouraging the intentional recognition and appreciation of simple, everyday occurrences or observations that bring a moment of joy, which can be recorded to enhance overall happiness and mindfulness.
Pushing Comfort Zones for Fun
The idea that engaging in new, unfamiliar, or even initially intimidating activities, especially with supportive friends, can lead to unexpected enjoyment, increased confidence, and a sense of accomplishment, despite initial fears of failure or looking foolish.
9 Questions Answered
A fun audit involves reflecting on past experiences where you had the most fun, considering what you were doing, who you were with, and where you were, to identify your personal 'fun factors' and understand what truly brings you joy.
The running club started as a way to exercise but grew into a deep friendship group that supported each other through major life events like deaths, divorces, and engagements, eventually becoming the core for their 'fun-terventions.'
True fun often involves a combination of playfulness (being goofy, not caring about failure), connection (shared experiences with others), and flow (losing track of time in an activity).
Each month, one person picks an activity and sets a date that works for them, without trying to coordinate with everyone. Whoever can make it attends, fostering connections even in smaller, unexpected groupings.
Pushing outside your comfort zone, especially with a supportive group, can lead to unexpected enjoyment, increased confidence, and a sense of accomplishment, despite initial fears of failure or looking foolish.
Having a structured schedule for fun interventions, often planned a month or two in advance, ensures that the activities actually happen and allows people to prioritize and 'save the date' amidst busy lives, making it easier to commit.
By engaging in diverse activities and being vulnerable together, the group develops deeper connections and camaraderie, leading to stronger support systems during difficult life events and a willingness to be truly honest with each other.
Start small with a few close friends; it doesn't have to be every month or involve a large group. Choose activities that are low or no cost, and be open to trying new things, as they are often more fun than expected.
The key is to be open to trying activities that might not initially be on your personal 'fun list.' The group dynamic and social connection often make any activity more enjoyable than anticipated, even if it's not your first choice.
15 Actionable Insights
1. Prioritize & Stage Fun-terventions
Intentionally prioritize having more fun in your adult life by staging regular ‘fun-terventions,’ which are planned activities designed for enjoyment and connection.
2. Conduct a Personal Fun Audit
Reflect on past experiences where you had the most fun (what, who, where) to identify your personal ‘fun factors’ and understand exactly why you enjoy them, guiding future activity choices.
3. Embrace New, Challenging Activities
Be adventurous and push your comfort zone by trying new activities you might expect to be bad at or even dislike (e.g., surfing, crossbows), as these often lead to unexpected enjoyment and growth.
4. Implement Structured Group Fun
For group fun, implement a structure where each person takes a turn to plan an activity that fits their schedule, and schedule these events one to two months in advance to allow members to ‘save the date’ and ensure consistent participation.
5. Seek Playfulness, Connection, Flow
When planning fun activities, prioritize those that are social, make you forget your worries (flow), and encourage playfulness or goofiness, as this combination creates the most enriching experiences.
6. Cultivate a Non-Judgmental Group
Foster a group environment where everyone feels confident to try new activities without fear of judgment or embarrassment, even if they expect to be bad, as shared laughter and experience build strong bonds.
7. Start Small with Fun Interventions
Begin your fun intervention journey with a small group (e.g., 3-4 friends), less frequent events (e.g., quarterly), and choose low-cost or free activities to make it accessible and manageable.
8. Be Open to Unfamiliar Fun
Approach fun interventions with an open mind, even if the activity doesn’t immediately appeal to you, as experiences often turn out to be more enjoyable than initially expected.
9. Prioritize Social Connection
Attend group activities even if the specific event isn’t your top preference, as the social connection and camaraderie with friends often make the experience more fun than you anticipated.
10. Embrace Goofiness & Failure
Allow yourself to be silly and goofy during activities, not caring if you fail or look foolish, as this mindset enhances fun and reduces the pressure of always ‘doing the right thing.’
11. Record ‘Little Delights’
Keep a ‘Little Delights’ notebook to record simple, amazing things you encounter daily, taking a minute to appreciate and think about them, fostering a sense of wonder.
12. Offer Practical Group Support
Leverage the deep connections formed through shared fun to offer practical, tailored support to friends during difficult times, such as sharing advice or helping with tasks.
13. Inspire Fun in Others
Share your fun interventions (e.g., through social media) to inspire friends, family, and even co-workers to create their own fun activities, spreading the joy and fostering new connections.
14. Maintain Forgiving Group Dynamics
Ensure a forgiving group dynamic where members are not penalized or ‘kicked out’ for missing events, which encourages long-term participation and comfort within the group.
15. Expand Fun Beyond Friends
Consider expanding your fun interventions beyond close friends to include extended family members, co-workers, or couples to broaden your social connections and experiences.
9 Key Quotes
I'm a fun person, but I don't really have that much fun, and I sit on the couch, and I watch TV, and yeah, that's relaxing, but it's not really fun.
Natalie Robinson
What I loved was when you said, so many times people say, oh, that was so fun, but was it really fun? And what does fun mean to you? And going through that fun audit of like think of the times that you were having the most fun and what were you doing? Who you were with? Where were you? And you can start to see the things that really are fun to you.
Natalie Robinson
The other thing that, when I listened to it, I thought about the world as a really exciting place and there's so many fun things to do and you get caught in your normal and your routine.
Jen Moran
I also liked what you said in one of the interviews in the podcast about Little Delights. And so I actually started a notebook of Little Delights, but I love that idea that like even just simple things that happen or you see that you can say, wow, how amazing is that? And just take a minute to think about it and record it.
Lisa Whelan
It's not so much the activity, but sometimes we'll throw a date out. And how we started it was, if you're the person doing the fun intervention, you say, it's going to be this date, this is what we're doing. And maybe everybody can come, maybe only two people can come. And what I love is I'll be out at a fun intervention and it'll be with two people in the group that I wouldn't normally spend the day with.
Lisa Whelan
I think some of it too is no one wants to miss it even if you're not interested in the event but you're free you'll go because you want to be with everybody and I think that's the kind of thing where it can that benefit of social connection can really push you to take part in these activities that you might not have gone to but inevitably are going to be more fun than you think.
Lisa Whelan
I would say the playfulness I got out of the fun intervention because you don't in your regular life you know you just try to always be doing the right thing making the right decisions but when we were doing like say the flower arranging we were like stealing flowers out of other people's arrangements because theirs looked better and I didn't have as many and laughing about it so I definitely think it's helped me be more silly and stuff.
Lisa Whelan
I think there's a bonding that by participating in so many different types of activities and really putting yourself out there with a group of people I think we put ourselves out there even when we have hard times and we rally around each other.
Jen Moran
I would just say start small it doesn't have to be every month it doesn't have to be a group of 13 people if you have a close group of four friends and you make a point of even four times a year each person schedules something and it's something that doesn't have to even be expensive a lot of the things that we did were actually no cost at all and some were pretty nominal cost and just getting out there and finding something new and different that you want to explore or do together.
Lisa Whelan
1 Protocols
The Fun Intervention Group Protocol
Lisa Whelan, Jen Moran, and Natalie Robinson- One person is assigned to pick an activity for a specific month.
- The person picking chooses the activity and the date that works best for their schedule.
- Do not try to coordinate or clear the date/activity with everyone; whoever can come, comes.
- Schedule the fun intervention a month or two in advance to allow participants to 'save the date.'
- Be open to trying activities that may not initially align with your personal 'fun factors,' as the group connection often makes them enjoyable.