How to Lead the Richest Life Possible

Overview

Dr. Laurie Santos speaks with University of Chicago professor Shige Oishi about 'psychological richness,' a third dimension of a good life beyond happiness and meaning. Oishi argues that we should seek diverse, interesting experiences and perspective changes by pushing beyond comfort zones and embracing spontaneity.

At a Glance
18 Insights
38m 3s Duration
16 Topics
7 Concepts

Deep Dive Analysis

Introduction to Psychological Richness

Origin of the Psychologically Rich Life Concept

Illustrating Life Dimensions: Shige's vs. Dad's Life

Defining Happiness as a Life Dimension

The 'Happiness Trap' Explained

The 'Meaning Trap' and its Challenges

Identifying Psychologically Rich Events

Formal Definition of a Psychologically Rich Life

Prevalence of Psychologically Rich Lives in Studies

Tip 1: Cultivating Playfulness for Richness

Tip 2: Embracing Serendipity and Spontaneity

Tip 3: Finding Awe Through Aesthetic Experiences

Tip 4: Exploring More and Deviating from Routine

Tip 5: Turning Adversity into Rich Experiences

Embracing Uncertainty and Finding Richness in Familiarity

Recap of Tips for a Psychologically Rich Life

Psychologically Rich Life

A life characterized by diverse, interesting experiences that often lead to a change in perspective. It's about accumulating interesting stories and experiences rather than material wealth, fostering growth and learning from novel situations.

Happiness (Life Dimension)

Not merely a temporary mood, but a sense of satisfaction with one's life trajectory and how it has turned out. It is strongly associated with stable relationships and financial security.

Meaningful Life (Life Dimension)

A life often associated with making a significant difference, either on a grand scale (like changing the world) or through smaller, consistent contributions to one's community, such as helping neighbors or participating in local organizations.

Happiness Trap

A cultural phenomenon, particularly in the United States, where happiness is equated with success. This creates pressure to always feel happy, leading to rumination and potential depression when negative emotions are experienced, as they are perceived as personal failures.

Meaning Trap

The pitfall of pursuing a meaningful life by either setting impossibly grand goals (like changing the world) or by narrowly focusing on the well-being of a small in-group, potentially leading to antagonism towards out-group members.

Playfulness

A crucial aspect of a psychologically rich life, involving taking a vacation from daily obligations and responsibilities. It allows adults to engage in activities for fun, fostering curiosity and preventing burnout, as seen in athletes and scientists who diversify their pursuits.

Awe

A sense of feeling small in the face of something vast and transcendent, like nature or art. It involves a merging of oneself with the experience and is often found in aesthetic encounters that expand one's horizons beyond everyday life.

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What is a psychologically rich life?

It is a life filled with diverse, interesting experiences that often lead to a change in perspective, accumulating a wealth of stories and insights rather than just material possessions.

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How do psychologists typically define happiness?

Happiness is generally understood as a sense of satisfaction with one's life and how it has turned out, rather than just a temporary mood, and is strongly linked to stable relationships and financial security.

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What is the 'happiness trap' and why is it problematic?

The 'happiness trap' occurs when happiness is equated with success, leading to immense pressure to always feel happy. This can cause people to ruminate on negative emotions, viewing them as failures, which can be a precursor to depression.

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What are the potential pitfalls or 'traps' of seeking a meaningful life?

One trap is setting impossibly grand goals for making a difference, leading to feelings of failure. Another is focusing too narrowly on the well-being of a small in-group, which can foster antagonism towards out-group members.

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How can one identify an event as psychologically rich?

A psychologically rich event is not just novel or interesting, but also complex, evokes a range of emotions, and most importantly, leads to a significant change in one's perspective or view of the world.

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How common is it for people to lead a psychologically rich life?

Studies suggest a non-trivial number of people lead psychologically rich lives, with estimates ranging from 5% in local newspaper obituaries to 35% in Singapore, and 15% in New York Times obituaries.

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How can adults cultivate playfulness to enrich their lives?

Adults can cultivate playfulness by taking a 'vacation' from their daily obligations and responsibilities, allowing themselves to engage in activities purely for fun, which can prevent burnout and foster broader curiosity.

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Why is embracing serendipity and spontaneity important for psychological richness?

Serendipity and spontaneity are springboards for interesting experiences, as the most memorable events are often unplanned. An over-scheduled life deprives individuals of random encounters, conversations, and readings that can lead to new discoveries.

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How can aesthetic experiences contribute to a psychologically rich life?

Aesthetic experiences, such as reading novels, watching movies, or viewing art, allow for mental transportation and immersion into other worlds and lives, expanding one's horizons and offering vicarious dramatic emotional experiences that are hard to achieve in person.

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How can individuals explore more and deviate from routine in their daily lives?

Even with packed schedules, one can explore by changing their commute, driving through different neighborhoods, getting off a train at an unfamiliar stop, or simply enjoying getting lost in a new town, embracing the anxiety as a future rich experience.

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Can adversity be transformed into a psychologically rich experience?

Adversity, from major traumas like earthquakes to everyday failures, can become a source of psychological richness if one learns from the events, changes their perspective on the world or themselves, and sees it as a springboard for growth.

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What advice is there for those who are afraid to try new things to enrich their lives?

For those hesitant to embrace entirely new experiences, one can find richness by digging deeper into familiar objects or people, such as re-reading a favorite book, re-listening to a favorite song, or discovering new aspects of a long-known partner or friend.

1. Embrace Playfulness

Cultivate a childlike curiosity and sense of fun by taking breaks from daily obligations and responsibilities, as playfulness is a huge part of leading a psychologically rich life and can protect against burnout.

2. Embrace Serendipity & Spontaneity

Actively seek and be open to random moments and spontaneous encounters, as they are a springboard for interesting experiences and psychological richness, even if it means being a little pushy and accepting rejections.

3. Experience Richness by Proxy

Expand your horizons and experience different lives vicariously by immersing yourself in novels, movies, art, and other aesthetic experiences, which allows for mental transportation and dramatic emotional experiences hard to achieve in person.

4. Explore and Deviate

Introduce variety into your daily life by exploring new things, such as changing your commute, getting lost in a new town, or simply taking a different route, embracing the mindset of letting yourself go and deviating from schedules when possible.

5. Transform Adversity into Richness

Reframe disappointments, setbacks, and even everyday failures as opportunities for psychological richness by learning from them, identifying positive lessons, and seeing how they change your perspective, ultimately adding texture to your life story.

6. Adopt Richness Mindset

Cultivate a ‘richness mindset’ to become less afraid of negative emotions or events, accepting them and learning from them to avoid rumination and depression, and becoming more adventurous.

7. Embrace Uncertainty

Embrace uncertainty and unpredictability as inherent parts of life, as this attitude maximizes the possibility of adding psychological richness to your experiences and prevents rumination when things don’t go perfectly.

8. Avoid Over-Scheduling Life

Resist the urge to over-schedule every aspect of your life, as this deprives you of spontaneous encounters, conversations, and readings that are crucial for psychological richness.

9. Maintain Wide Curiosity

Keep your curiosity wide open and avoid specializing too early, as an open mindset allows you to find interesting connections, prevents burnout, and fosters major discoveries in professional arenas.

10. Release Pressure to Be Happy

Avoid the cultural pressure to always feel and express happiness, especially when not genuinely happy, to prevent rumination and potential depression, and to naturally accept minor bumps in life.

11. Avoid Happiness-Success Trap

Do not equate happiness with success, as this mindset can lead to feeling like a failure when not happy, which is an unfortunate and dangerous trap that fosters rumination.

12. Broaden Meaningful Impact

When seeking a meaningful life, avoid focusing too narrowly on the well-being of only close others, as this can lead to antagonism towards out-group members and limit your impact.

13. Find Novelty in Familiarity

If hesitant to try completely new things, delve deeper into your favorite familiar objects, music, literature, or even conversations with familiar people to discover new aspects and enrich your experience.

14. Find Open-Minded Friends

Seek out friends who are open to new experiences and will encourage you to try unfamiliar things, as they can be a conduit to psychological richness by dragging you to interesting experiences.

15. Be Agreeable to New Things

If you have friends who suggest new activities, be agreeable and try them, even if you wouldn’t initiate them yourself, to expand your experiences and foster psychological richness.

16. Vary Your Commute

Introduce novelty into your routine by changing your commute; drive through different neighborhoods or get off the train at an unfamiliar stop to explore, even with a packed schedule.

17. Learn From Everyday Failures

Actively try to construe something positive or identify a lesson learned from everyday failures and negative events, as this adds texture and enriches your life by changing your perspective.

18. Find Humanity in Adversity

Adversity can reveal unexpected pro-social and altruistic behaviors in others, leading to a regained sense of confidence in humanity, which contributes to psychological richness.

In your psychological bank, you have lots of interesting experiences and stories to tell to others. Whereas if this person doesn't have that many interesting stories to tell, then even if their bank account is huge, maybe psychologically speaking, they are impoverished.

Shige Oishi

The guy who owns this bookstore in Morocco said he read 4,000 books, so he says he lived 4,000 lives.

Shige Oishi

We define psychologically rich life as a life filled with diverse, interesting experiences and that often come with the change in perspective.

Shige Oishi

When you equate happiness with success, then when you're not happy, you're failing.

Shige Oishi

Over scheduled life that we all live right now is really not great for psychological richness.

Shige Oishi

uncertainty and unpredictability are part of life and we should embrace it and to the extent that you embrace it you're maximizing the possibility of adding the richness to your life

Shige Oishi

if you're afraid of trying something new actually just going back to your favorite movie or favorite song and favorite band and things like that you can actually find something new from the familia

Shige Oishi

Strategies for a Psychologically Rich Life

Shige Oishi
  1. Find ways to be more playful: Take a break from responsibilities and cultivate childlike curiosity and fun.
  2. Be more open to the random: Embrace serendipity and spontaneity, finding moments for unplanned encounters and conversations.
  3. Experience psychological richness by proxy: Engage with books, paintings, or movies to visit faraway places, witness wonders, or hear amazing stories.
  4. Explore more: Throw variety into daily routines, such as changing your commute or getting lost in a new town.
  5. See the richness in adversity: Recognize that disappointments and setbacks can add to your life story and foster growth.
20 years
Years Shige Oishi studied happiness From 1995 to 2015
0.15
Correlation between household income and happiness In 1995, indicating it was not very strong
32%
Percentage of New York Times obituary subjects rated as leading a happy life Based on a study of obituaries
32%
Percentage of New York Times obituary subjects rated as leading a meaningful life Based on a study of obituaries
15%
Percentage of New York Times obituary subjects rated as leading a psychologically rich life Based on a study of obituaries
5%
Percentage of Charlottesville local newspaper obituary subjects rated as leading a psychologically rich life Lower than NYT, possibly due to less detailed information or different demographics
35%
Percentage of Singapore study subjects rated as leading a psychologically rich life Highest percentage observed in studies mentioned
300 articles
Number of articles written by fellow assistant professor Bob Kruger Mentioned by Shige Oishi as an example of productivity
4,000 books
Number of books read by a Moroccan bookstore owner Used to illustrate living many lives vicariously
1995
Year of the Kobe earthquake A devastating natural disaster in Japan
over 6,000 people
Number of people who died in the Kobe earthquake The death toll from the 1995 earthquake
16 years
Years after the Kobe earthquake when survivors still reported lower life satisfaction Observed in 2011, indicating time did not heal everything for those who lost homes
20 years
Years Shige Oishi has known his wife Context for discovering new aspects of familiar people