Stop Looking for the Perfect Job - a "Good Enough Job" is Just Fine

Overview

Dr. Laurie Santos and author Simone Stolzoff discuss "workism," the modern tendency to make work our primary identity and source of meaning. They explore the psychological costs of over-investing in careers and offer strategies to reclaim life from work by diversifying identity and embracing a "good enough job."

At a Glance
10 Insights
31m 34s Duration
16 Topics
4 Concepts

Deep Dive Analysis

The Societal Question: What Do You Do?

Re-evaluating Our Identity from Work

Challenging the 'Love What You Do' Mantra

Simone Stolzoff's Personal Search for a Vocational Soulmate

The Emergence of Work as a Sacred Calling

Defining Workism and Its Core Dangers

Historical and Cultural Factors Driving Workism

The Psychological Costs of Over-Investing in Work

Burnout and Physical Consequences of Work-Centric Lives

Social Costs of Overwork and Undiversified Identity

Introducing the Concept of a 'Good Enough Job'

Strategies for Re-evaluating Work's Role in Life

Creating Intentional Non-Work Time and Avoiding Optimization

Investing in Multiple Non-Work Identities and Communities

Defining Your Own Relationship with Work

Adopting the 'Work is Not Done, But It Is Time to Stop' Mantra

Workism

Workism is a term describing the phenomenon where work becomes akin to a religious identity, serving as a primary source of community, purpose, and meaning beyond just a paycheck. The danger lies in neglecting other life aspects and facing existential crisis if one's job is lost.

Good Enough Job

A 'good enough job' is a subjective concept referring to an occupation that allows an individual to be the person they want to be, meeting their personal criteria for income, title, or hours. This framework encourages appreciating work's foundational role while investing energy in non-work aspects of life.

Diversified Identity

A diversified identity means having multiple distinct sources of meaning and self-worth in one's life, rather than solely relying on work. This approach fosters resilience against adversity and prevents the depletion of energy for non-work relationships and pursuits.

Optimization Mindset

The optimization mindset is the tendency to try and make every moment productive, even during leisure time. This can lead to turning non-work activities into another form of work, hindering genuine rest, play, and the ability to derive meaning from non-productive pursuits.

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Why do people commonly ask 'What do you do?' when meeting someone new?

This question is often asked because, implicitly, people believe their jobs deeply reflect who they are, seeing work as a fundamental part of their identity beyond just a means to earn a living.

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What is 'workism' and what are its potential downsides?

Workism is the belief that work is a central, almost religious, identity providing purpose and community. Its downsides include neglecting other life aspects, experiencing an existential crisis if a job is lost, and fostering burnout by tying self-worth directly to output.

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What historical and cultural factors contributed to work becoming so central to identity in the U.S.?

Historical factors include the intertwining of capitalism and the Protestant work ethic, while more recent trends involve a decline in organized religion, healthcare often being tied to full-time jobs, and a cultural idolization of CEOs and 'side hustles'.

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What are the psychological and social costs of over-investing in one's work?

Psychological costs include guilt when leaving a job, high rates of burnout and stress, and an emotional roller coaster tied to productivity. Socially, it leads to neglecting other aspects of identity and relationships due to depleted energy and time.

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What is the concept of a 'good enough job'?

A 'good enough job' is a subjective job that allows you to be the person you want to be, whether through income, title, or hours, enabling you to live your desired life and invest in non-work aspects of yourself and your community.

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How can individuals diversify their identity beyond their professional roles?

Individuals can diversify their identity by actively carving out time and space for non-work pursuits, engaging in activities that reinforce non-work identities, and creating social communities around those interests.

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How can one avoid the 'optimization mindset' when engaging in leisure activities?

A key antidote is to embrace play, focusing on present moment awareness rather than future achievement or success. Engaging in activities that are ends in themselves, like playing music, dancing, or board games, can serve as a counterbalance.

1. Re-evaluate Work Identity

Gently question the identity you derive from your job and renegotiate its role in your life, especially if it leads to stress, burnout, or covers up emptiness outside of work.

2. Diversify Identity & Meaning

Actively invest in non-work aspects of your life like relationships, spiritual life, family, or hobbies to create a diversified identity and multiple sources of meaning, making you more resilient and well-rounded.

3. Actively Pursue Non-Work Activities

Carve out time and actively engage in non-work pursuits, as acting yourself into better ways of thinking and doing things reinforces a diversified identity and meaning.

4. Define “Good Enough” Job

Subjectively define what a “good enough job” means for you (e.g., income, title, hours) and recognize it once achieved, then redirect energy from seeking a “perfect” job towards appreciating its role and investing in your life outside of work.

5. Create Non-Work Infrastructure

Establish intentional “sacred space” or “sacred time” for non-work activities by creating infrastructure (like joining a class or group) that structurally prevents you from working, ensuring dedicated time for other pursuits.

6. Embrace Play, Not Optimization

Counteract the tendency to optimize by embracing play (e.g., jamming, dancing, board games) that is grounded in present moment awareness and is an end in itself, rather than a means to future achievement or productivity.

7. Define Work Relationship

Proactively define your desired relationship with work, rather than letting your employer dictate it, to align work with your values and vision for a well-lived life outside of it.

8. Rest Before You Need It

Prioritize rest and a sustainable, balanced approach to work before you experience burnout, as this proactive strategy leads to greater long-term productivity and effectiveness.

9. Start Small, Non-Work Activities

When diversifying your identity or starting non-work activities, begin with small, manageable steps (e.g., a jog instead of a marathon) rather than over-optimizing or planning grand, long-term goals.

10. “Work Not Done, Time To Stop”

Adopt the mantra “The work is not done, but it is time to stop” to help set boundaries and conclude your workdays, especially when working for yourself or on personal projects with infinite capacity for more work.

Some people love what they do and other people do what they have to do so that they can do what they love when they're not working. And neither is more noble.

Anis Mojgani

Too many of us bring the best of ourselves to work and then bring the leftovers home.

Esther Perel

We can't think ourselves into better action, but we can act ourselves into better ways of thinking.

Simone Stolzoff (paraphrasing Alcoholics Anonymous literature)

The work is not done, but it is time to stop.

Caspar Tarkail

Our desks were never meant to be our altars.

Simone Stolzoff

Strategies for Re-evaluating Work's Role and Prioritizing Life

Simone Stolzoff
  1. Set up intentional non-work time: Create infrastructure around non-work time, such as going to a yoga class or on a run, that structurally prevents working. Start with small steps, like a jog, rather than immediately aiming for demanding activities like a marathon.
  2. Get out of the optimization mindset: Embrace play, focusing on present moment awareness rather than future achievement or success. Engage in activities that are ends in themselves, such as playing music, dancing, free writing, or board games, to counterbalance the natural tendency to optimize every moment.
  3. Invest in multiple non-work identities: Actively carve out time and space for non-work pursuits and do things that reinforce those identities. Create social communities around these interests, such as joining a sports team, where your identity is decoupled from your work.
  4. Define your own relationship with work: Consciously put a stake in the ground to determine what you want your relationship to work to be. This allows you to fall back on those values and ensure work serves your vision of a life well-lived, rather than becoming the central axis of your existence.
  5. Adopt the 'work is not done, but it is time to stop' mantra: Recognize that there is an infinite capacity for more work, but consciously choose to stop at a certain point each day or week to prioritize other aspects of your life and prevent burnout.
22 years old
Simone Stolzoff's age when he interviewed Anis Mojgani While studying poetry and economics at the University of Pennsylvania.
His entire 20s
Duration Simone Stolzoff spent looking for a 'vocational soulmate' Working in advertising, tech, food, and journalism.
Over 9 out of every 10 Americans
Peak religiosity in the United States (1950s) Associated with some sort of organized religion.
Almost 1 in 3 Americans
Decline in religious affiliation in the last 30 years Do not affiliate with a religion.
More than 2 years
Duration Simone Stolzoff spent writing his book Tinkering with the project.