#123 William Irvine: How To Live a Stoic Life

Nov 2, 2021
Overview

Author and philosophy professor William Irvine discusses Stoicism, exploring its origins and practical tenets. He outlines strategies to manage emotions, embrace challenges, and make decisions, offering actionable insights for a more resilient life.

At a Glance
25 Insights
1h 6m Duration
20 Topics
10 Concepts

Deep Dive Analysis

William Irvine's Path to Stoicism

Defining Stoicism and its Ancient Roots

Key Roman Stoics and Their Interpretations

Stoic Approach to Enjoyment and Preparedness

True Stoicism: Minimizing Negative, Maximizing Positive Emotions

Understanding the Hedonic Treadmill and Dissatisfaction

The Rise of Stoicism: Why it's Popular Now

Stoic Technique: Negative Visualization Exercise

Stoic Technique: The Trichotomy of Control

Managing Intrusive Thoughts and Anger: The Five-Second Rule

Recognizing Self-Inflicted Harm from Setbacks

Navigating Praise, Criticism, and Anti-Mentors

The Stoic View on Failure and Hard Challenges

Cultivating Self-Discipline for Life Control

Teaching Stoicism to Younger Generations

Developing a Psychological Immune System

Stoic Principles for Effective Decision-Making

The Balance of Skepticism and Open-Mindedness

Ancient Philosophical Schools Beyond Stoicism

Reflections on Teaching and Personal Legacy

Stoicism (philosophy)

Stoicism, founded by Zeno of Citium, is a philosophy focused on achieving a good life filled with delight and joy, while minimizing negative emotions like anger and anxiety. It provides psychological strategies for living well.

Emotional Preppers

Stoics mentally prepare for potential losses and setbacks, not to be negative, but to cultivate profound gratitude for what they currently possess. This practice helps them savor life and avoid taking things for granted.

Lowercase s Stoics

This refers to the common misconception of Stoics as emotionless, unfeeling individuals who simply 'suck it up' and endure hardship without showing any reaction. Actual Stoics were well-adjusted and sought to minimize negative emotions while maximizing positive ones.

Hedonic Treadmill

Humans are wired to constantly seek more, raising their standards once a desire is met, leading to perpetual dissatisfaction. This evolutionary trait, while once advantageous for survival, often leads to unhappiness in modern life.

Negative Visualization

This Stoic practice involves intentionally imagining losing things you value, like loved ones, health, or possessions, to foster gratitude and prevent taking them for granted. It's a flickering thought, not prolonged dwelling on negativity.

Trichotomy of Control

An expansion of Epictetus's dichotomy, this framework divides life's elements into three categories: things you have complete control over (e.g., values), things you have no control over (e.g., asteroid impacts), and things you have some but not complete control over (e.g., a tennis match outcome). The focus should be on what you can control.

Meta Anger

As a practicing Stoic, one might experience anger not just at an external event, but also at oneself for allowing the event to trigger anger, recognizing it as a failure to maintain emotional control.

Anti-Mentor

An anti-mentor is someone whose values are so different from your own that if they approve of your actions, it suggests you might be straying from your own chosen path or playing a game you don't intend to play.

Psychological Immune System

Similar to the biological immune system needing exposure to germs, the psychological immune system strengthens by encountering and overcoming challenges, insults, and setbacks. Without such exposure, individuals may 'crumble' when faced with difficulties.

Confirmation Bias

This psychological phenomenon causes individuals to selectively gather information that supports their current views, while disregarding information that challenges them. It can lead to closed-mindedness and the strengthening of potentially mistaken beliefs.

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What is Stoicism?

Stoicism is an ancient philosophy of life, founded by Zeno of Citium around 300 BC, that aims to help individuals achieve a good life filled with positive emotions and minimal negative emotions by using specific psychological strategies.

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How do Stoics approach enjoyment and material possessions?

Stoics enjoy what life offers, like fine wine, but without becoming addicted or clinging to it. They are always prepared for things to take a turn for the worse, which fosters gratitude for what they have rather than taking it for granted.

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Are Stoics emotionless or unfeeling?

No, the common perception of 'stoic' (lowercase s) as emotionless is a misconception. Actual Stoics were known as cheerful individuals who aimed to minimize negative emotions and prevent them from arising, while being connoisseurs of positive emotions like delight and awe.

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Why are humans so often dissatisfied, even after achieving goals?

Humans are 'wired' for dissatisfaction due to evolutionary advantages; ancestors who were constantly seeking more and worrying about the future were more likely to survive and reproduce. This leads to a 'hedonic treadmill' where standards constantly rise, and new desires emerge after old ones are met.

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Why is Stoicism experiencing a resurgence in popularity now?

Stoicism is popular because it is 'hackable,' offering specific, easy-to-learn psychological techniques that people can try with a low 'price of admission' compared to other philosophies. People find these techniques effective, and the word spreads.

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How can one deal with intrusive negative thoughts or anger?

A strategy is to recognize that these thoughts are like 'roommates' in your skull that you're stuck with. William Irvine suggests a 'five-second rule' to reframe potential anger-inducing incidents as a test within five seconds, preventing the anger from bursting into a full flame.

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How should one handle praise and criticism, especially from social media?

Stoics are selective about praise, valuing it most from designated mentors who truly understand. Praise from strangers or those with different values should be viewed cautiously, as it might indicate one is straying from their own path. Criticism, especially from those 'not in the arena,' can often be dismissed.

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What is the Stoic view on failure?

Stoics view failure as an admirable sign that someone is attempting difficult tasks. If one never fails, the Stoic response would be to 'do something hard then.' Engaging in challenging activities, even with the risk of failure, is part of Stoic training to grapple with internal voices and build self-discipline.

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How can parents teach Stoicism to their children?

The teenage years are a prime time for developing Stoicism, as it helps deal with social interactions. One strategy for kids dealing with insults is to make a joke out of it or, even better, respond with no response at all, which is the ultimate put-down of the insult.

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How does one develop a 'psychological immune system'?

Similar to how a biological immune system needs exposure to germs, a psychological immune system develops by being exposed to challenges, insults, and irritants rather than being shielded from them. A 'psychological bubble' makes one crumble when faced with difficulties.

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What is the Stoic approach to making decisions?

Stoics advise fragmenting decisions into parts you can control and parts you can't, focusing attention on the controllable aspects. It's crucial to invest quality time in brainstorming and mapping out all possible options, including non-obvious ones, to increase the chance of picking an optimal choice.

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How can one balance skepticism and open-mindedness?

To have a mind full of true and useful beliefs, one must be simultaneously skeptical (to filter out false ideas) and open-minded (to allow new, potentially true ideas in). This involves actively exploring new ideas, acknowledging that old beliefs might be mistaken, and genuinely listening to intelligent people on opposing sides without trying to refute them.

1. Master Your Life with Self-Discipline

Cultivate self-discipline to actively control the one life you have, as failing to do so means allowing external forces to dictate your path, which is a profound waste.

2. Practice Negative Visualization Daily

Regularly imagine losing things you take for granted (e.g., loved ones, health, job) for a fleeting moment. This practice fosters profound gratitude for what you currently possess, preventing complacency and enhancing joy.

3. Focus on Controllable Elements

Categorize aspects of your life into things you have complete control over, some control over, or no control over. Direct your energy and attention solely to the things you can influence, as worrying about uncontrollables is a waste of time and energy.

4. Choose Your Values and Goals

Actively select and define your personal values and life goals, as these are within your control. Subsequently, develop a clear strategy to achieve these chosen aspirations.

5. Reframe Unhappiness and Setbacks

Recognize that much of your unhappiness is self-inflicted and stems from your state of mind. Reframe challenging events as ’tests’ to find workarounds and extract positive lessons, rather than letting them trigger negative emotions.

6. Employ the Five-Second Anger Rule

Upon noticing the earliest signs of anger, give yourself five seconds to reframe the situation. This brief pause can prevent the anger from fully igniting and becoming deeply entrenched.

7. Set Two Goals for Setback Tests

When confronting a setback, aim to achieve two things: first, find a successful workaround to overcome the challenge, and second, and more importantly, prevent yourself from becoming angry or upset while working towards the solution.

8. Minimize Self-Inflicted Harm

Understand that your emotional response to a setback often causes more harm than the setback itself. Prevent self-inflicted damage by not allowing a flood of negative emotions to take over.

9. Enjoy Life Without Addiction

Savor and embrace what life offers without becoming addicted or clinging to it. Maintain a mindset of preparedness for things to take a turn for the worse, which paradoxically enhances appreciation.

10. Prepare Emotionally for Loss

Act as an ’emotional prepper’ by mentally preparing for things to become dramatically worse or for the loss of valued possessions and relationships. This practice cultivates profound gratitude for what you currently have.

11. Be Picky About Praise

Be selective about whose praise you value; celebrate it from designated mentors who truly understand, but be wary of praise from others whose values you do not understand or agree with.

12. Identify and Utilize Anti-Mentors

Recognize ‘anti-mentors’ as individuals with radically different values than your own. Their criticism can be a positive sign that you are not playing their game, and their praise might indicate you are doing something wrong according to your own values.

13. Shape Your Environment Proactively

Understand your own psychological reactions and proactively shape your environment to avoid unnecessary negative influences, such as limiting exposure to social media if you know it triggers negative responses.

14. Control Exposure to Harmful People

Consciously manage your exposure to individuals who are not beneficial or are actively harmful to you. If you willingly expose yourself to such people, you bear responsibility for the consequences.

15. Embrace Failure for Growth

View the capacity to fail as an admirable sign that you are attempting difficult tasks. Recognize that failure is an inevitable and valuable part of challenging yourself and growing.

16. Seek Out Hard Challenges

If you find yourself never failing, actively seek out and switch to tasks that are genuinely hard for you. This pushes your boundaries and fosters personal development.

17. Grapple with Inner Voices

Engage in challenging activities that force you to confront and overcome internal voices that encourage quitting or slowing down. This builds mental resilience and self-control.

18. Never Give In to Quitting

Avoid succumbing to internal voices that urge you to quit, as giving in empowers them and makes it significantly harder to resist in future challenges.

19. Maintain Distance from Difficult Relatives

For relatives you cannot choose but find difficult, sometimes the best solution is to maintain a respectful distance. When interactions are unavoidable, remind yourself that their behavior is simply ‘what they do’ and may be beyond their control.

20. Respond to Insults with Humor or Silence

When insulted, either use humor to deflect or, more effectively, offer no response at all. This demonstrates that their words have no power over you, as they are ‘simply words’.

21. Expose Kids to Psychological Challenges

Allow children, especially teenagers, to experience psychological challenges and irritants. This exposure is crucial for developing a robust ‘psychological immune system’ and effective coping strategies.

22. Map Out Decision Options

For decision-making, first separate controllable from uncontrollable elements, focusing on the former. Then, invest quality time brainstorming and mapping out all possible options, including unconventional ones, to ensure you consider the optimal choice.

23. Be Skeptical and Open-Minded

Cultivate a mind that is simultaneously skeptical (to filter out false beliefs) and open-minded (to accept new, true, and useful beliefs). Acknowledge that many of your existing beliefs may be mistaken.

24. Counter Confirmation Bias Actively

Actively combat confirmation bias by not only being open to new ideas but also deliberately exploring them. Seek out evidence that might challenge your existing beliefs, rather than just confirming them.

25. Seek Out Opposing Viewpoints

Actively engage with intelligent and articulate individuals who hold opposing viewpoints. Listen carefully with the genuine intention to learn from them, rather than to refute or disprove their arguments.

Self-discipline means what? It means you are controlling the one life that you have to live. And then the follow-up question is, so if you're not controlling that life, who or what is? And why would you allow something else to control the one life you have to live? What a waste.

Shane Parrish

The Stoics can be regarded as emotional preppers. So what were they doing? They were preparing for things to become dramatically worse. They were preparing to lose the things they value in life. And that can sound like a really negative approach to things, except that they had the insight that if you do that, then you'll be profoundly grateful for whatever it is you do have in life.

William Irvine

One of the Stoic insights is that much of our unhappiness is self-inflicted. It's a question of your state of mind. It's a question of you framing the things that happen to you in a way that makes them not just more tolerable, but where you can actually extract the light from them.

William Irvine

We're like thirsty people chasing mirages in a desert. We work so hard to get to that seeming pond off in the distance, only to realize it's a mirage. And then we go to the next seeming pond off in the distance.

William Irvine

Usually the setback is going to harm you. But usually what harms you the most is your response to the setback.

William Irvine

If you never fail, you might say, I've never failed. And then the Stoic response is, well, do something hard then.

William Irvine

Giving into those voices encourages them hugely. You know, they live in the back closet of your mind and they're always trying. But you give them one big success, you know, where you actually do quit. And it's like giving them superpowers.

William Irvine

If you lived in a psychological bubble, that is in an environment in which you never had challenges, in which people never insulted you, in which it was just always smooth and easygoing when someone else took care of whatever bothered you, you would be like the bubble boy. And as a result, as soon as you were exposed to psychological challenges, you would crumble.

William Irvine

One of the new ideas is that many of your old ideas are mistaken. That's a sign of open-mindedness, you know, if you sort of acknowledge, yeah, a bunch of what I believe right now, those beliefs are mistaken.

William Irvine

Negative Visualization Exercise

William Irvine
  1. Think about things in your life that you rely on daily (people, job, health) that you take for granted.
  2. Imagine that thing is suddenly gone; fill in the details of its absence.
  3. For a concrete example with eyesight, close your eyes and imagine that's all you would ever see.
  4. Imagine your eyes are glued shut and you can never open them again, allowing that feeling to soak in.
  5. Open your eyes and take a look, appreciating how incredible it is, realizing your life is full of such things you take for granted.
  6. Snap out of it and go on with life, using it as a flickering thought to foster gratitude.

Dealing with Intrusive Thoughts/Anger: The Five-Second Rule

William Irvine
  1. Notice the earliest signs of anger or an intrusive negative thought.
  2. Within five seconds, attempt to reframe the incident or thought.
  3. Treat the episode as a 'test' or 'challenge' to find a successful workaround.
  4. Focus on not letting yourself get out of control, angry, or upset while working through the challenge.
  5. Remind yourself that most harm from setbacks is self-inflicted by dwelling on negative emotions.
300 BC
Founding of Stoicism by Zeno of Citium Approximate time the first Stoic lived
400 million years old
Age of a fossil rock found by William Irvine The rock was a fossil from an ancient sea
200,000 to 70,000 years ago
Period of human evolution on African savannas Rough numbers for when ancestors developed dissatisfaction for survival
Beginning of the 19th century
Approximate time philosophers lost interest in Stoicism When Stoicism dropped off in academic philosophy
12 copies total
William Irvine's initial sales expectation for 'A Guide to the Good Life' Reality-based expectation due to lack of general audience books on Stoicism
more than one per day
Current rate of new general audience Stoicism books Reflects the 'Stoic Renaissance'
five seconds
Time to reframe an anger-inducing incident in the 'five-second rule' Before anger bursts into a flame
40 years ago
Memory recall for upsetting events by people with memory loss People with dementia can recall upsetting events from this far back in graphic detail
7.5 billion people
Approximate number of people who didn't show up for a rowing race William Irvine's perspective on 'beating' those who didn't participate
10-mile
Distance of Shane Parrish's regular run Out five miles and back five miles
three and a half
Mile mark where a shortcut is available on Shane Parrish's run Point where he can choose to take a shortcut
nine instead of 10
Shortened distance if Shane Parrish takes the shortcut Reduces the total run distance
three months
Time it took Shane Parrish to recover from taking the shortcut once Difficulty in resisting the shortcut after giving in once
10 or 12
Age of the 'bubble boy' when he received a bone marrow transplant The transplant unfortunately led to his death due to a lurking germ
one pound of dirt
Recommended amount of dirt for kids to eat for a healthy immune system Official medical advice, not literally a pound of dirt, but exposure to germs