Matthew Dicks: The Storytelling Expert

Sep 3, 2024
Overview

Master storyteller Matthew Dicks shares his blueprint for crafting compelling narratives that resonate deeply. He reveals how to find, structure, and deliver stories by focusing on audience engagement, vulnerability, and the strategic use of stakes, suspense, surprise, and humor, transforming everyday moments into unforgettable experiences.

At a Glance
73 Insights
2h 1m Duration
19 Topics
10 Concepts

Deep Dive Analysis

Defining Good Stories vs. Mere Reporting

Distinguishing Stories from Anecdotes

The Spoon of Power: A Story Example

Story Architecture: Avoiding Over-Description and Leveraging Imagination

Maintaining Audience Interest: Stakes, Suspense, Surprise, Humor

Common Storytelling Mistakes and Their Fixes

Crafting Effective Story Beginnings and Endings

How Movie Openings Predict Their Endings

Strategic Listening for Storytellers

Critique of Storytelling in Popular Films

The Ethics of Truth in Storytelling

'And' Stories vs. 'But/Therefore' Stories

Finding Engaging Stories in Everyday Life

Using Metaphors for Business Storytelling

Own Stories vs. Other People's Stories

Cultivating Confidence and Vulnerability in Storytelling

Differences Between Writing and Telling a Story

Strategies for Teaching Kids to Love Writing

Matthew Dicks' Definition of Success

Story

A narrative about change over time, typically involving a realization ('I used to think one thing, now I think another') or a transformation ('I once was one kind of person, now I'm authentically different'). It goes beyond mere chronological reporting of events.

Anecdote

A brief, often humorous or interesting incident that doesn't necessarily involve change over time. It's enjoyable in the moment but tends not to linger in memory or connect deeply with life experiences, unlike a true story.

Strategic Listening

An active approach to consuming content (like movies, books, or other stories) where you analyze not just what is being said, but *how* it is being said to achieve a specific effect. It involves pulling apart the threads to understand the underlying techniques.

Stakes

The element in a story that makes the audience care, wonder, or root for a character or outcome. It's the reason listeners want to hear the next sentence, providing an initial hook and evolving throughout the narrative.

Backpacks

A storytelling technique where the speaker explicitly states their plan, hopes, or goals to the audience. This builds anticipation, especially when the plan is set to fail, creating surprise and tension when expectations are subverted.

Breadcrumbs

Clues or hints strategically dropped throughout a story that make the audience wonder about something later. These act as subtle foreshadowing, leading listeners to anticipate connections or future developments without revealing the full picture.

Hourglasses

A technique used to slow down the pace of storytelling when the audience's attention is at its peak. By making listeners wait longer for crucial information, anticipation increases, leading to a more impactful emotional reaction when the moment finally arrives.

Crystal Balls

Explicit predictions made within a story about what will happen. This leverages the human tendency to be 'prediction machines,' making the audience eager to continue listening to see if the prediction comes true, thereby maintaining engagement.

Humor in Storytelling

A powerful tool that changes brain chemistry, making audiences feel closer to the speaker, perceiving them as intelligent, and improving cognition. It can be used to relax an audience, make boring parts engaging, manipulate emotions, or provide a necessary breath after difficult content.

'But/Therefore' Stories

A narrative structure where scenes are connected by cause and effect, meaning 'this happened, but then that happened, therefore this resulted.' This creates motion and ensures every scene is essential, unlike 'and' stories which are just a series of unconnected events.

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What is the fundamental difference between a good story and a bad story?

A good story is about change over time, often a realization or transformation, whereas a bad story is merely a chronological report of events without meaningful change or a reason for the audience to listen.

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How does a story differ from an anecdote?

An anecdote is a brief, often funny incident that doesn't require change over time and isn't deeply remembered, while a story aims to linger in the audience's mind, connecting to their emotions and life experiences through a meaningful change.

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Why should storytellers avoid excessive description?

Over-describing steals audience bandwidth and prevents them from leveraging their own imagination, which is more powerful than any collection of words. Audiences primarily want to know what was felt, said, and done.

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What are the most common mistakes people make when telling stories?

People often describe too much, waste the beginning by explaining rather than engaging, and fail to deliver a clear 'five-second moment' of change or meaning at the end.

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How do you identify the 'five-second moment' or the core message of a story?

The 'five-second moment' is the genuine change, transformation, or realization that occurs, representing how the storyteller's perception of the world, self, or a concept has evolved.

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How should a story's ending inform its beginning?

The beginning of a story should almost always be in perfect contrast to its end, showing the state before the change or realization occurred, thereby creating a clear arc of transformation.

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What makes a movie or story memorable versus forgettable?

Memorable stories have an ending moment that is deeply relatable and resonant throughout the narrative, making the audience feel they've watched characters achieve something they hope to do someday. Forgettable ones often introduce ideas at the beginning but don't carry them through consistently.

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Is it acceptable to lie when telling stories?

No, lying in stories erodes trust. While it's acceptable to remove inconvenient details (not for personal benefit, but for story flow), condense time, or shorten locations, the core truth and vulnerability must remain.

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How can storytellers make their narratives more engaging than a simple chronological recounting?

Instead of telling 'and' stories (this happened and then this), storytellers should use 'but/therefore' connections, where each scene logically leads to the next, creating motion and ensuring every element is essential.

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How can everyday moments be transformed into engaging stories?

By recognizing that life is filled with small, seemingly insignificant moments that can be imbued with meaning, and by constantly asking what can be said next to keep the listener engaged through stakes, suspense, surprise, and humor.

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How can business professionals use personal stories to convey complex messages?

By finding personal metaphors that illustrate business concepts (e.g., a simple solution to a marriage problem illustrating a business bottleneck), making the message relatable, human, and unforgettable, rather than just presenting data.

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How can one learn to be more confident and vulnerable in storytelling?

Confidence often comes from experiencing that sharing vulnerable stories leads to extraordinary positive responses, not judgment. It's like jumping off a high dive: terrifying the first few times, but repeated exposure shows it's okay, making it easier over time.

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What is the difference between writing a story and telling a story?

A written story can use more adjectives and relies on paragraph/sentence structure to replace intonation and pacing, often sounding more grammatically correct. A told story relies on voice, improvisation, and imperfection to create authenticity and connect directly with the audience.

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How can parents encourage their children to love writing?

Prioritize making writing fun over correcting spelling, grammar, or handwriting. Encourage reading aloud, offer six positive comments for every one corrective comment, and allow kids to write on multiple topics and abandon projects if they're not working.

1. Prioritize Audience Needs

Successful storytellers prioritize what the audience actually wants to hear and experience, rather than what the storyteller personally wants to describe or convey.

2. Define Single End Message

Begin by determining the single, clear message or point you want to convey at the end, as trying to say too many things results in saying nothing impactful.

3. Create Story Arc with Contrast

Ensure the beginning of your story is in direct contrast to its end, creating a clear arc of change over time.

4. Structure Stories Around Change

Ensure your story is about change over time, typically a realization, making it more interesting than just reporting events.

5. Compel Audience to Listen

Acknowledge that audiences need a compelling reason to listen; relentlessly entertain and provide value to be appreciated and impactful.

6. Optimize Story Beginnings

Launch stories at the most engaging point, avoiding wasting the beginning with explanations or background information.

7. Practice Vulnerability

Embrace vulnerability in storytelling; initial fear gives way to extraordinary audience connection with practice.

8. Share Vulnerabilities

Share your “stupidities, shames, and foolishnesses” to foster deep connection, as audiences value authenticity.

9. Tell Your Own Stories

Prioritize telling your own stories over others’ to convey vulnerability and connect more deeply with the audience.

10. Connect Emotionally, Not Literally

Aim for the audience to connect with feelings or thoughts, not exact events, for deeper story impact.

11. Engage with 4 Story Elements

Incorporate stakes, suspense, surprise, and humor to keep the audience engaged and entertained.

12. Remember Story Beats

Instead of memorizing stories or speeches, remember the key beats and events for natural, adaptable delivery.

13. Adapt Story Delivery

Know your content but not exact wording, allowing you to read the audience and pivot for a personal talk.

14. Embrace Imperfection for Connection

Allow for imperfections in storytelling; they signal authenticity and make the audience feel spoken to.

15. Tailor Talks to Audiences

Adapt content and delivery based on the specific audience, rather than delivering a generic, memorized speech.

16. Connect Scenes with “But/Therefore”

Transform disconnected “and” stories into “but” and “therefore” narratives to create meaningful connections and motion.

17. Use “But” for Anticipation

Leverage the word “but” to signal a deviation from expectation, immediately creating anticipation for the next part.

18. Leverage Audience Imagination

Use general terms to activate audience imagination, allowing them to fill in details with their own powerful mental images.

19. Minimize Adjectives

Reduce adjectives, as audiences primarily want to know what you felt, said, and did, not extensive descriptions.

20. Make Details Relevant

Ensure any descriptive detail introduced early in a story is relevant later, to avoid consuming audience bandwidth unnecessarily.

21. Start with “Elephant” Stake

Begin your story with a clear, interesting “elephant” to immediately grab attention, even if it’s not the ultimate point.

22. Open with Humor

Make the audience laugh within the first 30-60 seconds of a story or talk to alleviate anxiety and signal competence.

23. Use Humor for Connection

Incorporate humor to change brain chemistry, making the audience feel closer, perceive intelligence, and listen better.

24. Use Personal Metaphors

Find personal life examples that serve as metaphors for business lessons to make them unforgettable and resonate.

25. Humanize Business Content

Translate business content into human, personal stories to make it resonate emotionally and become unforgettable.

26. Practice Strategic Listening

Actively analyze why content evokes specific reactions to understand and reproduce those elements in your storytelling.

27. Recognize Small Moments for Stories

Cultivate a mindset that recognizes everyday life is filled with potential stories, even tiny, seemingly insignificant moments.

28. Create Suspense Selectively

Generate suspense by strategically excluding some information while including just enough to make the audience wonder.

29. Employ “Hourglasses” for Anticipation

When the audience is eager, slow down the pace and make them wait to heighten anticipation.

30. Make Predictions (“Crystal Balls”)

Make explicit predictions about what might happen to engage the audience’s desire to see if they come true.

31. Deliver Speeches from Memory

Remember key points for speeches rather than memorizing or reading a script to sound authentic and live.

32. Structure Writing for Impact

Craft sentence and paragraph structure (e.g., punchlines as separate paragraphs) to mimic spoken pacing and impact.

33. Lead with Evidence, Not Topic

In engaging writing, lead with supporting details, allowing the audience to infer the main point, rather than starting with a topic sentence.

34. Allow Audience to Infer

Leave conclusions unsaid, trusting the audience to put pieces together, as people enjoy figuring things out on their own.

35. Drop Subjects for Punchy Writing

Experiment with dropping subjects in sentences (e.g., “Went to the store”) to make writing punchier and more action-oriented.

36. Foster Love of Writing

For children, prioritize fostering a love for writing over correcting mechanics, as enjoyment leads to practice and improvement.

37. Have Children Read Writing Aloud

Instead of correcting a child’s writing visually, have them read it aloud, as spoken words often convey more beauty.

38. Allow Multiple Writing Projects

Let children pursue multiple writing projects and abandon work if not good, mirroring professional writers.

39. Use a 6:1 Positive Feedback Ratio

When giving feedback, aim for six positive comments for every corrective one, delivering criticism gently and last.

40. Embrace Continuous Evolution

Define success as constantly evolving, being presented with new challenges and opportunities, rather than maintaining stasis.

41. Avoid Rigid Planning

Resist overly rigid long-term planning to preserve the opportunity to stumble upon new ideas and challenges.

42. Develop Strategic Storytelling Skills

Become more strategic in your storytelling to connect with people emotionally and identify their needs.

43. Prepare Re-engagement Anecdotes

Carry a few short, engaging anecdotes to use if the audience’s attention wanes, to re-capture their interest.

44. Avoid Over-Preparation

Do not be overly prepared or memorize content, as this traps you in delivery and prevents adaptation.

45. Generally Keep Stories in Moment

Most of the time, maintain stories within the immediate moment, unless there’s an extraordinary reason to jump ahead.

46. Open Stories with Action, Wonder

Start your story with an engaging mix of location, action, and wonder to immediately hook the audience.

47. Deliver Meaningful Story Point

Have a clear point or message that leaves the audience feeling their time was well spent, offering new perspective.

48. Present Relatable Problems

In trailers or hooks, clearly present a relatable problem without revealing the solution, to build curiosity.

49. Open Podcasts with Questions

For podcasts, start by presenting a question or identifying an audience need to immediately grab attention.

50. Analyze Content Mechanics

Develop the habit of pulling apart content to understand its mechanics, recognizing what works for effective storytelling.

51. Describe by “Is Not”

Describe things by what they “are not” rather than what they “are” to create dynamic, energized sentences.

52. Create Lasting Impact with Vulnerability

Be courageous enough to share vulnerable, personal stories, as they create lasting “markers” in people’s lives.

53. Don’t Fear Vulnerability Judgment

Do not fear judgment when sharing vulnerable stories, as audiences typically respond with kindness and appreciation.

54. Remember, Don’t Memorize

Remember the flow and key elements of your story rather than memorizing exact words, for authentic delivery.

55. Adapt Story Elements to Audience

Adjust story elements (humor, emotion) based on audience and context for maximum impact and connection.

56. Tell Process Stories

Share compelling stories about the process of your work (e.g., how a book was written) to engage audiences interested in the “how.”

57. Build Investment with Journey Stories

When promoting, tell stories about the creation journey rather than just content, to build audience investment.

58. Recognize Emotionally Impactful Moments

Pay attention to moments that evoke strong emotions or “sear in your brain,” as these often contain powerful stories.

59. Relate to Universal Behaviors

Incorporate universally relatable human behaviors (e.g., playing it cool) to connect with the audience through shared experience.

60. Employ Non-Chronological Structures

Consider starting a story in the middle and flashing back to avoid boring chronological narratives and maintain engagement.

61. Temper Hero Stories with Vulnerability

If appearing as a hero, temper the story with vulnerability and mistakes to be more relatable and avoid self-aggrandizement.

62. Use Humor for Boring Content

Employ humor to make boring parts of stories or data presentations more engaging and palatable.

63. Heighten Contrast with Humor

Make the audience laugh just before delivering a terrible part of a story to increase emotional contrast.

64. Humor for Post-Difficulty Relief

After sharing a difficult part, use humor to provide the audience with a moment of relief and processing.

65. Use Locations to Activate Imagination

Start scenes with clear locations to activate the audience’s imagination, allowing them to visualize the setting.

66. Maintain Audience Engagement

Constantly ask if the audience would care if the story stopped, striving for engagement even through interruptions.

67. Use Humor/Suspense for Boring Parts

When facing unavoidable boring parts, proactively make them suspenseful or funny to maintain audience engagement.

68. Prioritize Strong Structure

Focus on proper story structure—starting right, landing on meaning, avoiding nonsense—as more critical than perfect sentences.

69. Three Quick Storytelling Improvements

To quickly improve, ensure good structure, adequate performance, and concise content.

70. Increase Suspense with Information

Providing more information (without revealing the full answer) can paradoxically increase suspense and curiosity.

71. Cultivate Audience Eagerness

Strive to make your audience happy you’re still talking, eager for the next thing, by consistently providing reasons to listen.

72. Support Podcasts by Following

If you enjoy a podcast, hit the follow button to help the show attract better guests.

73. Use Overlap for Podcast Curation

Try the Overlap app to use AI-driven curation to discover and learn from the best podcast moments.

No one wants to hear anything you ever have to say unless you give them a reason to listen.

Matthew Dicks

We play a game with our audience. They pretend that we're making it up and we pretend that we're making it up.

Matthew Dicks

I often think of anecdotes as cotton candy. It's like delicious in the moment and lovely but you don't really remember your cotton candies but you remember the best meals of your life. Stories are the best meals of your life.

Matthew Dicks

Nobody ever wants to know what anything looked like unless it's relevant to a story. What people really want is to know what you felt, what you said, and what you did.

Matthew Dicks

The power of your imagination is always more powerful than any collection of words that I can assemble.

Matthew Dicks

If you say a bunch of things, you're not saying anything.

Matthew Dicks

The more information you provide, the greater the suspense increases.

Matthew Dicks

The but is the most powerful word in all of storytelling.

Matthew Dicks

It's in the imperfection that the beauty lies.

Catherine Burns (quoted by Matthew Dicks)

Stasis is death.

Matthew Dicks

Story Architecture for Compelling Narratives

Matthew Dicks
  1. Identify the core scenes, predicated on changes in location.
  2. Focus on conveying what was felt, said, and done, rather than over-describing visual details.
  3. Leverage the audience's imagination by using words that activate existing mental images, rather than dictating them.
  4. Continuously maintain audience interest by incorporating stakes, suspense, surprise, and humor.
  5. Connect every scene using 'but' and 'therefore' to ensure logical progression and eliminate unnecessary content.

Learning to Tell Better Stories

Matthew Dicks
  1. Become a 'strategic listener' by analyzing *how* great stories, movies, or content achieve their impact, rather than just consuming them.
  2. Recognize that your life is filled with potential stories, even small, seemingly insignificant moments, as they can be imbued with great meaning.
  3. Cultivate a mindset of constantly asking yourself what you can say next to keep the audience listening and engaged.
  4. Utilize suspense by strategically excluding some information while including just enough to make the audience wonder.
  5. Practice with the goal that if the 'power goes out' during your story, the audience would desperately want you to continue.

Crafting a Story's Beginning and End

Matthew Dicks
  1. Start at the end: Determine the single 'five-second moment' of change, transformation, or realization you want to convey.
  2. Define the beginning: Ensure the story's start is in perfect contrast to its end, showing the initial state before the change occurred.
  3. Launch the story in an engaging way: Begin with location, action, or a bit of wonder, avoiding lengthy explanations or teaching upfront.
  4. Incorporate an immediate hook (humor, suspense, or a crystal ball prediction) within the first few sentences to grab the audience's attention.

Teaching Kids to Love Writing

Matthew Dicks
  1. Prioritize making writing fun and enjoyable over correcting mechanics like spelling, grammar, or handwriting.
  2. Always have children read their writing aloud, as their spoken words often convey more beauty and meaning than what's on the page.
  3. Allow kids to work on multiple writing projects simultaneously and give them permission to abandon work they no longer find compelling.
  4. When offering feedback, aim for a 'six to one' ratio: provide six positive comments for every one corrective suggestion, focusing on kindness and encouragement.
8 to 12
Number of spoons people typically have in their kitchen Used to illustrate how a common object can become meaningful through storytelling.
18 minutes
Duration Matthew chased Jamie for the spoon During recess at school.
10-year-old
Jamie's age when he found the spoon A red-headed boy.
16 years
How long Matthew has had the Spoon of Power Since Jamie gave it to him.
2007
Year Steve Jobs introduced the iPhone His first sentence on stage was a 'stake'.
two and a half years
Time Steve Jobs waited to share the iPhone He had been sitting on the product.
five anecdotes
Number of anecdotes Matthew carries to re-engage a lost audience To 'throw out and grab them back'.
30 to 60 seconds
Timeframe to make someone laugh at the beginning of a story to put them at ease Helps the audience relax and feel the speaker knows what they're doing.
seven friends
Number of friends a Facebook user needed to make in 10 days to likely stay on the platform An early data point Facebook identified as a bottleneck for user retention.
21
Matthew's age when he was in an armed robbery at McDonald's A moment that profoundly shaped his confidence.
7,000 dollars
Amount of money Matthew had in a bag during the armed robbery A deposit he dropped into a chute.
14-foot
Height of the high dive at Matthew's town pool Used as a metaphor for overcoming fear and vulnerability.
six to one
Ratio of positive comments to corrective comments teachers aim for In teaching, to encourage kids and make them love writing.
130 pages
Length of novel Matthew's daughter wrote at age 12 before abandoning it An example of allowing kids to abandon work if it 'sucks'.