Priyanka Chopra Jonas on Self-Worth, Success and Walking Your Own Path #157
Priyanka Chopra Jonas discusses her journey, defining success as contentment, and how her upbringing shaped her resilience. She shares how small changes helped her overcome grief and her mission to increase South Asian representation in Hollywood.
Deep Dive Analysis
10 Topic Outline
Priyanka Chopra Jonas's Philosophy on Success and Positivity
Childhood Influences: Empowerment and Opinion
Priyanka's Journey of Self-Discovery and Writing 'Unfinished'
The Power of Reflection and Journaling
Adapting to Change and the 'Be Like Water' Metaphor
Processing Grief and Overcoming Emotional Walls
Strategies for Making Small Changes to Improve Well-being
Navigating Public Criticism and Online Negativity
Identity, Representation, and Breaking Cultural Barriers
Redefining Personal Success and Finding Contentment
5 Key Concepts
Contentment as Success
Priyanka Chopra Jonas explains success not as fame or money, but as waking up excited for the day and going to bed with a calm, contented heart. This state of mind, rather than external achievements, is the true measure of success.
'Be Like Water' Metaphor
Priyanka's father taught her to be like water, which can be as powerful as a waterfall or as still as a teacup. This mental model encourages adaptability, resilience, and the ability to use one's strengths in various situations while remaining flexible.
Power of Small Changes
When feeling stuck or in a dark place, Priyanka found that making tiny shifts in routine or environment, rather than a complete overhaul, was key to rediscovering herself. These small, spontaneous actions can break negative patterns and foster a sense of confidence.
Thick Hide for Online Negativity
Priyanka describes developing a 'thick hide' over 20 years to cope with constant public critique. This involves distinguishing between professional critique and personal attacks, and prioritizing the opinions of a trusted inner circle (family, friends, team) over anonymous online trolls.
Importance of Representation in Pop Culture
Priyanka highlights that the lack of South Asian representation in mainstream English-language entertainment contributed to her feeling 'different' and isolated as a teenager. She emphasizes that seeing diverse leads normalizes identity for younger generations and broadens their sense of possibility.
7 Questions Answered
Priyanka defines success as being able to wake up excited for the day, feeling calm and content when going to bed, and having a sense of purpose. It has nothing to do with bank accounts, holidays, or who one marries.
Her positivity stems from a desire to keep moving and not be stagnant, and her mother's teaching that seeing the good in any situation takes away the power of the bad, as someone else is always worse off.
Her parents empowered her to have opinions from a young age, even changing a nameplate to include her name when she was five, which instilled a strong sense of self-worth and confidence, teaching her that failure of a task is not a failure of herself.
Writing 'Unfinished' was a healing and cathartic process for Priyanka, allowing her to introspect and be honest about her life, addressing things she had never spoken about before, even to herself.
She initiated small changes in her routine and patterns, such as meeting a friend instead of going straight home, or sitting in a different part of her house, which helped her break negative cycles and rediscover herself.
Priyanka has developed a 'thick hide' over 20 years, prioritizing the opinions of her core circle (family, friends, team) over anonymous online trolls, and recognizing that such negativity often seeks attention and doesn't affect her job.
Having experienced bullying and feeling 'different' as a teenager due to a lack of South Asian representation, Priyanka is driven to see brown people as leads in mainstream entertainment to normalize their identity and expand possibilities for future generations.
21 Actionable Insights
1. Cultivate Self-Worth & Confidence
Develop a strong sense of self-worth and confidence, understanding that failure in an endeavor does not equate to personal failure, which empowers you to try new things.
2. Redefine Personal Success
Define success by waking up excited for the day and going to bed with contentment in your heart, rather than external metrics like career, fame, or money.
3. Process and Accept Emotions
Instead of running from emotions, allow yourself to sit with and fully feel all your feelings, practicing acceptance of what you’re experiencing to emerge stronger and more balanced.
4. Be Adaptable Like Water
Cultivate adaptability, learning to be both powerful and persistent like a waterfall, and calm and comforting like still water, to navigate life’s challenges effectively.
5. Practice Journaling & Reflection
Engage in journaling or writing about your life to gain perspective, reflect on experiences, and uncover forgotten aspects that may need re-evaluation, investing in self-reflection.
6. Break Toxic Routines
If your routine becomes toxic or holds you back, change it by introducing spontaneous activities like meeting a friend, taking a walk, or changing your usual environment to reconnect with a more confident self.
7. Prioritize Trusted Opinions
Filter external criticism by prioritizing the opinions of your core circle (family, friends, team) and giving less weight to anonymous or unresearched online negativity, especially if it doesn’t impact your core responsibilities.
8. Foster Children’s Individuality
Parents should empower their children by encouraging them to have their own thoughts, opinions, and dreams, rather than imposing their own expectations.
9. Advocate for Representation
For those with opportunity, take responsibility to expand opportunities and advocate for better representation in various fields, especially for underrepresented groups, to normalize diverse presence.
10. Form and Voice Opinions
Develop and express your own opinions, even if they differ from others, as having an opinion is crucial for personal growth and contribution.
11. Embrace New Beginnings
View new places or changes as a ‘blank slate’ where you can redefine yourself, free from past failures or perceptions, fostering a sense of power and opportunity.
12. Find Good in Every Situation
Actively seek out the positive aspects in any situation, as this practice diminishes the negative power of adverse circumstances.
13. Choose Not to Wallow
When facing sorrow or self-pity, make a conscious choice not to be consumed by it, instead taking stock of your achievements and choosing to protect what you’ve built.
14. Disempower Online Trolls
Consciously choose to remove the power from online trolls and negative comments by not giving them importance, as doing so is essential for your well-being and ability to live freely.
15. Pursue Diverse Career Paths
Explore career opportunities beyond traditional fields by identifying gaps in the market and leveraging available information, allowing ideas to transform into viable vocations.
16. Encourage Children’s Dreams
Parents should encourage their children to dream big and pursue their own aspirations, even if they deviate from stable, traditional career paths.
17. Find Inspiration for Motivation
To maintain motivation and perform your best, actively seek out and identify things that inspire you.
18. Get Out of Your Own Way
To overcome feeling stuck, actively try to ‘get out of your own way’ by shifting your perspective to find a positive aspect in the situation.
19. Prioritize Lifestyle Changes
Understand that making lifestyle changes is always beneficial because improving how you feel directly enhances your overall quality of life.
20. Share Valuable Content Kindly
Share content that resonates with you with friends and family, adding a personal note, as this act of kindness benefits both the receiver and your own happiness.
21. Explore Health Resources
If interested in topics like nutrition, sleep, stress, or behavior change, explore the host’s books and newsletter (Friday Five) for practical tips and valuable information.
5 Key Quotes
The greatest weapon I could ever have was a sense of self, self-worth, self-confidence, and knowing that even if I failed, it doesn't mean the failure of me. It just means the failure of a thing I tried. I could try something else.
Priyanka Chopra Jonas
If you just see the good in a situation, then, you know, it takes away the power from the bad because it is what it is.
Priyanka Chopra Jonas
Be like water. Water can be as powerful as a waterfall and can make holes in rocks over time. And it can be as still as a teacup and provide comfort. Be like water. Be able to be, use it for whatever strength it has, but also be able to adapt.
Priyanka Chopra Jonas's Father (as quoted by Priyanka)
I feel like when you have contentment in your heart, that is the best testament of success.
Priyanka Chopra Jonas
It is our job to make the table larger. It is our responsibility to bring to fore how important representation is.
Priyanka Chopra Jonas